Page 61 of Falling Off Script

JESSIE:

Open your analytics yet? Or still pretending it didn’t happen?

I call her. No preamble.

“He Zoom-bombed me.”

“You’re trending in six countries.”

“He changed his background to my face, Jessie.”

“To be fair,” she says, “it was a flattering freeze-frame. Excellent cheekbones.”

“I blacked out from shame and came to with a Twitch sponsorship offer.”

“Yeah,” Jessie says, completely unfazed. “BuzzBattle wants to do a reaction segment called ‘Zeta or Nah.’ You decide in real time if a clip is toxic or just cringey.”

I make a noise somewhere between a laugh and a low-level exorcism.

“You realize,” she adds, “he made you viral.”

“He made me a meme.”

“A good meme.”

I flop onto the bed and stare at the ceiling. “Jessie. Be honest. Are you... into him?”

She snorts. “No.”

“That was fast.”

“I mean, he’s hot, sure. And objectively charismatic. And surprisingly well-lit for someone who lives in constant moral shadow.”

I groan. “So yes.”

There’s a pause.

Then, quieter: “Look. I’m not saying he’s good for you. I’m just saying... he’s good for your content.”

I stare at the ceiling like it owes me money.

“You’re saying I should be grateful to the man who hijacked my livestream with photographic evidence of my worst romanticchoices?”

“I’m saying the internet already shipped it, built a fan wiki, and is currently arguing about your attachment styles on Reddit.”

I hurl a pillow across the room.

Jessie’s voice turns annoyingly gentle. “You don’t have to like him. Just don’t block what’s working.”

I don’t answer.

Mostly because I’m not sure if I’m still mad at Adrian—

—or at Jessie for not being mad enough.

29. Adrian

Matt looks like a man who just lost a duel to his own optimism.

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