Page 111 of Defending her Heart

They’re the least sexy pajamas I’ve ever seen, but they’re identical to Paisley’s. Kendall must have bought them for the two of them while I was away last week. A calmness I’ve never experienced before washes over me.

Later, after reminiscing about our day and Paisley insisting Kendall sleep with her, she’s finally asleep. I’m alone in my double bed looking over to where my daughter and Kendall are curled up together.

I’m half enamored, half envious of them. I want to be curled up with Kendall and Paisley. Shit. There’s no reason why I can’t be. I flip the covers back and crawl under the covers on the other side of Paisley so she’s in the middle of us.

Kendall’s eyes pop open before they droop half-closed. “Hey.”

“It got lonely over there all by myself.” I reach across my daughter and rest my hand on Kendall’s hip. “Is this okay?”

She smiles at me and nods. “It’s nice.”

It’s a fuck lot more than nice. It’s everything. I’m so fucking in love with Kendall, but if I tell her, I’m afraid she’ll shut down again. At the same time, I don’t want to waste another minute not letting her know how I feel.

“What are you thinking about?” she asks, tucking her hands under her cheeks as she eyes me with concern.

My fingers trail to her hip then make their way to her shoulder. I skim them down her arm until our fingers are linked, lightly resting over a sleeping Paisley. Thankfully, there’s no chance of her waking up anytime soon.

“Thank you for coming with us this weekend.”

Kendall snorts. “Like I had a choice,” she teases.

I lift our joined hands to my lips and kiss her knuckles. “I love you.” When she gasps, I release her hand and press my finger to her lips. “I don’t want you to respond. It’s okay if you don’t love me right now. I don’t need to hear the words from you, Kendall. But it’s important for me to let you know how I feel. You need to know how loved you are, not only by Paisley but by me as well. Even if you never return my love, know that I love you. You’re beautiful and intelligent, but what I love most is your heart. You’re selfless and care more about everyone around you than yourself. Let me care about you. Let me love you. That’s all I’m asking.”

I trace her lip with my finger then join our hands again.

“I grew up in a home with two loving, supportive parents. My sister is in a great relationship with her high school sweetheart. I’ve never experienced betrayal like you have, and I’m not going to pretend to understand how hard it is for you to trust and love someone again. All I can do is love you and do everything in my power to prove my loyalty to you. Please give me that chance.”

Her throat bobs and she swallows before nodding. “Okay,” the word comes out in a strangled whisper.

“Okay,” I say and smile. I close my eyes and snuggle our bodies closer to Paisley, making a tight unit.

She may not be able to trust and love me today, but someday she will. I’ll hang on to that hope for as long as I live.

CHAPTER THIRTY-NINE

KENDALL

ME: I’m calling an emergency meeting. Please tell me you’re free for a late dinner tonight. It’s a 911.

RILEY: I can do seven.

ROWAN: Seven works.

ME: Perfect. Tequila Sundays?

RILEY: On a Monday?

KENDALL: Fuck off with the humor. This is serious.

ROWAN: Kendall, if it’s an emergency I can find someone to cover the rest of my shift.

ME: Not that kind of emergency, but I can’t go another night without talking to you guys.

RILEY: Should we call Jackson too? He’s going to feel left out not knowing the tea.

ME: Fine. I’ll send him a separate text. Thanks guys. See you tonight.

Jackson has a meeting that won’t end until seven and promises to stop by if he has time. I’m okay either way. He’s more like me than the other two and is bound to make light of the situation and crack jokes, and I’m in no joking mood.

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