Page 76 of The VIP Package

And why?

Because I’m a self-centered, surly, egotistical asshole. That’s who I was twenty years ago. As much as I want to believe I’ve changed, that’s who I always will be. There’s no escaping it.

My mind starts to whirl, displaying the image of Camille’s sad face. She looked so forlorn at the marina. Doesn’t that prove I’m no good for her? The woman professed her wish for a full-time relationship, and what did I do?

I blew her off. I dodged the question, then left her standing alone in the moonlight. Only a buffoon would handle a woman’s heart so carelessly.

That’s what I did, though.

Camille bared her soul, sharing her feelings with courage and honesty. And there I stood, putting my walls up around me, not even brave enough to tell her today marked a milestone of grief in my life.

What kind of asshole does that?

“You.” I jerk my unsteady gaze to the mirror. “You areexactlythat kind of asshole.”

My own face stares back, haunted and pale and destined to remain alone forever. What I fool I’ve been to even entertain the thought of tying her down to my darkness.

Camille needs a man who can open up to her.

She deserves a guy who keeps her laughing.

Someone who won’t let her down.

I could never be the kind of man Camille needs. The problem, of course, is that she won’t believe that. She’ll think she can save me, convinced I’m a good man at heart.

What a joke.

But she’ll hold on to me like she held on to Hayden, wasting herself on a dead-end relationship. Wasting her life on a man who could never deserve her.

I can’t do that.

I can’t break the heart of a woman who deserves so much better.

Snatching my phone off the dresser, I pull up her name in my contacts. My hand shakes again as I type out a message that feels like I’m tearing my heart with my teeth.

I’m sorry, Camille. I care about you, but I can’t be what you need. It’s best if we break this off cleanly. At 10 a.m., my jet will be waiting at the airstrip. Kora will escort you, and the pilot is prepared to take you wherever you wish to go. Travel safely, Camille. You are truly exquisite.

I read the words closely, making sure I’ve been clear. That I’ve said what I needed to say.

It’s not what I want, but since when do I deserve to have that?

It’s better this way, in the long run. Camille can find someone more worthy, more stable. A man who can guarantee happiness and fulfillment and a million other things I’m not equipped to provide.

And I—well, I’ll go back to being the lonely, miserable, selfish prick I’ve always been.

The swoop as I send it rips a fresh hole in my chest, but it’s done. The only thing left is to tie up loose ends with the pilotand Kora. They’ll take care of her. Both can be counted on for kindness and compassion. That’s more than I can say for myself.

Once I’ve confirmed all the details, I power my phone down and set it aside. Facing the photo of my dead wife and child, I lie down in my clothes and plunge into fitful, wretched sleep.

CHAPTER 15

CAMILLE

“Motherfucker.”

I read Ashton’s words for the ten-millionth time. Nothing’s changed since I saw his message the moment I woke up at seven. He’s still not responding to texts or to phone calls, and there’s no other way I can reach him.

If I could just speak to him, I could turn things around. He’s panicking now, and that’s perfectly normal, given the grief-induced trauma he’s grappling with. That’s at the root of Ash’s response.

---