“Amelia, do you need anything?”Julie, my grandmother’s nurse, timidly asked as she moved around her bed.
“No, thank you.” I closed the Danielle Steel novel I was reading to her while she slept. My grandmother had every hardback written by the author at home in her library. I remember when I was twelve, and she found one of her precious copies in my room. She sternly lectured me, saying the material was inappropriate for a girl my age. After sensing my disappointment, she brought me out for ice cream shortly after to ease her guilty conscience for being so hard on me. That’s the type of grandmother she was, kind and compassionate, but firm when she needed to be.
Julie placed her hand on mine, squeezing it gently. “I know this is tough, but at least she had a good morning.”
Glancing over at her bed, I sighed. Even during her best days, she still got names and dates mixed up. So, while I was glad that her memories still came and went, it made me sad to think that one day they wouldn’t come at all.
I rubbed my tired eyes; sleep has been failing me this past week. All I wanted to do was settle into a peaceful dream and wake up from the nightmare that had become my life. Now that my engagement has become official, it’s become harder and harder to accept.
Julie titled her head, her expression softening into a smile. “That’s a beautiful ring. Congratulations.”
“Thank you.” I winced, realizing that my words lacked any enthusiasm.
I didn’t have the energy to fake happiness that I wasn’t feeling. And there wasn’t a bandage big enough to cover the hole in my chest. It wasn’t just my heart that hurt either, it was head, my body… everything hurt. Because I was crazy, stupid in love with a man who waited until I had a ring on my finger before telling me how he felt.
“Let me know if there is anything you need.” She squeezed my arm before walking off to attend to another patient. There was commotion at the door and I turned my head.
“I heard you were here.”
I was hoping to avoid Sophia this week. Not that I didn’t enjoy her company, I was just feeling too raw and emotional and the last thing I wanted to do was rehash what went down with her grandson. I’m sure she knew what happened on New Year’s Eve, and I wouldn’t blame her if I wasn’t her favorite person right now.
“Hey, Sophia. How are you?” My tone was too chipper, my smile was too tight. She raised her right eyebrow in challenge, letting me know that she was onto me. My elderly friend didn’t miss a trick.
“Well, I’m glad you asked.” She pulled a chair up next to me and got comfortable. “I’ve been wondering why you’ve been avoiding me?”
My shoulders deflated even though I knew I deserved it. “Please don’t take it personally. I’ve just had a really rough week.”
She continued to stare at me and it made me uncomfortable. “I understand. Everything is complicated right now.”
I reached for her hand, thankful that she was taking it easy on me. I expected some snappy comeback because Lord knew I deserved it. “I’ve missed you.”
“I’ve missed you too.” Her lips pinched together and she leaned forward. “I see you’ve got some new jewelry. That’s quite a rock you got there.” She frowned, staring intensely at my left hand. “It looks like you’ve made your decision.”
I looked down at my ring and swallowed. My heart felt as heavy as my left finger. “Like you said, it’s complicated.”
“I hope it works out for you,mio, caro.” I stole a glance at her face, it was filled with pity. I hated seeing that look in her eyes. And I hated how it made me feel. “I hope he at least treats you decent.”
Knowing what I knew of Owen, I doubt that would be true, but I’ve already made peace with my decision, so there was no point in crying over spilled milk. I’ve already agreed to the arrangement and it’s time I accepted it no matter how much I hated it.
“You think I’m crazy, don’t you?” I leaned forward in my chair and rested my elbows on my knees.
She pulled the small container of orange Tic Tacs out of her pocket and popped one in her mouth. “I only know that you do not love him. You love my grandson.”
I adjusted the blanket over my grandmother’s shoulders; she was starting to get restless. “I love Marco with everything I have, we just weren’t meant to be.”
“Perhaps if you met another time then?” she said, handing me one of her breath mints.
A tear fell and I wiped it away. “If my circumstances were different, there isn’t a doubt in my mind that we would be together, but that’s not my reality.”
She adjusted her sweater and leaned back in her chair. “The two of you never told me how you first met.”
I slipped the Tic Tac in my mouth and tried to hide my smile. “It’s kind of embarrassing. Why do you want to know so bad?”
“I’m an old lady.” She shrugged. “I like to hear the love story.”
“I’ll save you all the shameful details, but I was drawn to him right from the start. We kept running into each other, and I tried to resist him, but my heart couldn’t seem to stay away.”
“It sounds more like fate intervened.”