Page 74 of Whatever It Takes

“I know, but believe me, I’ve had to bite my tongue more times than I can count.”

“How are things with you and Quinn? Have you talked to him?”

“Can we talk about something else?”

She shook her head at me. “Charlotte, you’re human. As stubborn as he is, he knows that you have a mess to sort out. This whole situation is unique and confusing, and unfortunately, there is no instruction book to follow. You’ll just have to give it time for everything to work itself out.”

“I just want to close my eyes, snap my fingers and wake up from this nightmare.”

“A little sleep could probably do you some good. You look like hell.”

“Thanks for the compliment.”

She shrugged. “That’s what friends are for. Just keeping it real.” She stood and stared at her shoes, looking like she wanted to say more. We’ve been friends long enough for me to know that she wasn’t finished.

“I know you have something to say, so just spit it out.” I waved my hands around for her to get on with it.

She adjusted her bag along her shoulders. “Things are tricky right now, but Quinn loves you. At the end of the day, I think you guys will be fine. The sooner you get those papers signed, the closer you’ll be to getting your life back. Stop avoiding Grant and get it over with.”

I reached for the box of tissues sitting on the corner of my desk. I wiped the edge of my eye, trying not to smear my makeup. “I want all that. Believe me, I do. More than you know.”

“I’ll help you with whatever you need.”

I watched my friend walk away, knowing what I had to do. She was right; I needed to get the visit with Grant out of the way. But first I needed to talk to Quinn. I was a fucking mess and I really needed to hear his voice. I was falling apart and his strength was the only thing that kept me together.

I pulled out my phone and dialed his number.

“Detective Walker speaking.” His tone was cool and impersonal.

“I miss you,” I said, walking over to the window that overlooked the parking lot.

He sighed heavily into the phone. “I miss you too.”

I let out a breath that I didn’t even know I was holding. Obviously, things were strained between us, but it was comforting knowing that he was just as miserable as I was. That I wasn’t alone with my misery.

“When can I see you?”

“I’m trying to give you space, remember? This is what space feels like.”

“I know. I appreciate that but, God…” I sighed. “This is so damned hard.”

“Well, it hasn’t been a whole lot of fun for me either, but you can’t have it both ways.”

Jesus. He was so frustrating. “You’re acting like I don’t want to be with you and that couldn’t be further from the truth.”

“I refuse to be treated like the other man. You made it perfectly clear that Grant was your husband and that your place was with his family.”

I might still be legally married to Grant, but my heart belonged to Quinn. It always had. I might not have handled things the right way, but there was no way I could allow him to think that I wouldn’t choose him in the end.

“I’m not having doubts about us, I’m just trying to…”

“Do the right thing. Yes, you’ve mentioned that.”

“Quinn.” My palms were shaking. “I don’t want to fight with you, but you can’t possibly believe that I don’t want you.”

“I’m going to be honest here. I’ve done a lot of thinking.” His voice sounded so tired and defeated. Nothing like the man I knew. “Maybe you were right.”

I swallowed, almost afraid to ask. “About what?”

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