Page 89 of Hard To Love

Fortunately for me, my old closet still had a few of my clothes. I settled on a long-sleeved red silk shirt, and black pencil skirt. It was cute and flirty but not too revealing. My hair was pulled back into a ponytail because I didn’t have time to fuss with it, and I added a touch of makeup hoping it would cover up the red blotches on my cheeks. My eyes noted the time, causing me to panic. Brad would be here any minute and Chase was still waiting in the living room. Forcing myself to walk through the threshold, the awkwardness of this situation hit me like a ton of bricks. Here I was getting ready for a date with my ex while my current boyfriend, with whom I’d just had sex, was waiting for me in the other room.

When I finally made it into the living room, Chase immediately stopped talking. I saw him tense as he deliberately scanned my outfit. Slowly he stood up and walked towards me. His arms folded around my waist, as he pulled me up flush against his chest.

Cassie cleared her throat and quietly excused herself to give us a few more minutes alone.

Chase ran his hand along my neck and trailed his nose along my cheek. He inhaled deeply and whispered, “You still smell like me, good girl!” My heart beat rapidly as the heat from his touch lingered on my flesh. My body tingled all over from the combination of his touch and his words.

He placed a kiss on top of my head. “You are coming home to me tonight, right?” I could hear the strain in his voice as I forced my heart to beat at a normal pace. His eyes pierced mine while he waited for my response.

“Of course, where else am I supposed to go? It’s where I belong.” My carefully chosen words were not lost on him. His lips curved up into a small grin just before he kissed me senseless. My body instantly missed him as he made his way towards the door.

He rested his hand on the knob and turned towards me one last time. “Don’t forget what your boundaries are.” He reminded me in a cool tone before he walked out of the apartment.

Most people mistook his intensity as being possessive and controlling, but I knew that the true source was his unbinding love and loyalty to me. It was only when he felt scared or threatened for me that he felt the need to take control.

“Man, that was a little intense,” Cassie whistled, as she walked towards me. I looked around the room looking for something to lean against because my legs felt like they were going to give out on me at any second.

I collapsed in a chair feeling exhausted while Cassie stood over me with a worried look on her face. “Are you sure you can handle this? It’s never too late to back out.”

Lifting my head slowly I did my best to sound confident, “I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life.”

I watched as her face softened with a look of understanding. Jerking her head towards the door that Chase just exited she smiled. “He’s a real keeper, that one. I’m actually kind of jealous. I hope someone wants me like that someday.”

Yes, he is.I thought as I swallowed down the hurt of sending him away. My heart felt like it was being pulled apart in every sense of the word. How could I love and hurt so much at the same time?

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