Page 79 of Hard To Love

“Oh, my god!” I gasped as my hand flew up and covered my mouth in shock. It took my brain a minute to accept what it was hearing.

Sensing my panic, he turned my body around and pinned me in place with his steady gaze. “I swear to you on my mother’s grave that those drugs are not mine.”

His pleading eyes begged me to believe him. I blinked trying to gain a sense of composure. It was a struggle just to breathe as my brain fought to comprehend what the hell had happened. It was if the last three days had just been wiped from my mind, being replaced with whatever the hell this was.

My eyes flashed up to his, no matter how hard I tried; I knew I couldn’t mask the look of horror on my face. My brain was still processing the shocking revelation when the panic and anxiety set in.

“Whose drugs are they?”

He shifted his body away from me, while his hand rubbed the back of his neck. The ache in my chest stretched through me when I saw the look of apprehension flash in his eyes.

“They’re not mine. That much I can tell you.” He paused briefly as if he wasn’t sure how to say his next words “Emily, I’m being set up.”

My head jerked back not sure I heard him right. “What?”

Instead of answering me he pulled his lips tight and fisted his hands at his side as if he was struggling with control. I could feel the agitation pouring out of him. I knew there was no way those drugs were his. The truth was that the thought never crossed my mind. I assumed they belonged to someone else. Most likely, Colin.

Anger started to creep its way through my body when I thought about how much misery his brother’s problems had brought to our relationship. It took every ounce of restraint I could muster to hold back my true feelings about him.

“Who would want to set you up?” I asked, deciding to keep my opinions about Colin to myself for the time being.

He stared out into the Atlantic studying the movement of the waves as they rolled onto the beach. I could feel his anger fluttering around in the wind mixing with the strong current that was rushing along the shore. The breeze coming off the water only seemed to strengthen his fury.

He took in a deep breath and was unable to look in my eyes. My heart stung and I was at a loss for words as I watched the man I loved battle the war of emotions that was flowing through him.

“I know exactly who. I just need to figure out what I’m going to do about it.”

Genuinely confused I asked, “What are you saying?”

“Someone wants what I have.” There was a coldness in his tone that I couldn’t ignore, but his answer left me with more questions than answers. My head was spinning with questions, as I patiently waited for him to start and fill in the many blanks to our conversation.

“There has to be some kind of logical explanation. Could someone have left them there by accident? The drugs are obviously not yours. Are you sure they don’t belong to your brother? I mean it’s his office too and it wouldn’t be the first time he got himself mixed up with this crap.”

He violently raked his hands through his hair then snapped. “Emily, the package was found in a locked safe in my office. It was no accident. I know exactly who’s responsible and it’s NOT my brother.”

He closed his eyes briefly then snapped them to mine “It was Brad, Emily. He was the officer in charge of the case. This shit storm has his name written all fucking over it.”

I could feel my back snap straight as I tried to process his words.

“There is no way Brad would do something like this.”

His head swung towards mine and I could see the incredulous look spread across his hard features. His jaw tightened and his expression was an equal mixture of hurt and anger. “Really, Emily? I’m getting fucked over by your ex and the first thing that comes to mind is for you to defend him? Are you fucking kidding me?” He shouted.

I immediately regretted my choice of words and wished I could take them back. Clearly that wasn’t the smartest thing to say but I had known Brad for a long time. There was no way he could be capable of doing something so malicious. As I let the sting of Chase’s comment sink in, I struggled to make sense of the facts.

Clearly Brad was involved somehow. Could the Brad I knew and loved be capable of stooping so low? Did he think this would make me want him back? When I allowed myself to believe the possibility of it all being true, a raging anger like I had never felt before started to roll through me.

Without warning, a plague of guilt overwhelmed my conscience when I realized that this was all because of me. My hands raked around his neck, with a desperate need to pull him close to me.

“Chase, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean it like that. I’m having a hard time accepting the fact that a person who I thought I knew so well would be capable of something like this. I believe you. I want to help you but I’m struggling with how to fix this for you. If what you’re saying is true, you are in this situation because of me.”

A seething anger towards Brad started to build inside me and the feeling of betrayal settled in my heart. If Brad was responsible, I would never forgive him. Hurting Chase was like hurting me. I had a hard time wrapping my head around the twisted logic of Brad’s actions. He couldn’t possibly think this would bring us back together?

“You don’t need to worry about me. Everything will be fine. I’ll make sure of it.” He declared, then pulled me tight against his arms and held me as we both tried to give the other person whatever comfort we could. I only wish my confidence matched his.

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