Page 62 of Hard To Love

He shifted, and rested his arm on top of the bar, with a smile set on his lips. “Really? Are you sure, because I could swear we had chemistry together?”

I groaned a little but found myself chuckling at his attempt to hit on me. Maybe it was the effects of the whiskey kicking in, but it was enough of an icebreaker to start a conversation. I smiled back, letting him know that he had cracked the door open.

“Ah, she does smile. I’m Noah, by the way. Can I buy you another drink?”

I decided that there was nothing wrong with a little harmless flirting, and at fifteen bucks a drink, it was quite a bargain. I didn’t want to be rude, but I really needed to find Cassie and Liam so I hammered out a quick text, letting her know where to find me.

Noah watched me, while I paid too much attention to my keyboard. “I must be losing my touch, you seem bored already.”

“I’m sorry. You’re right, I wasn’t being very polite.” I admitted, and then put my phone away. After shifting my attention back to Noah, I thanked him for the drink and accepted the seat that he offered. As I sat back in the chair, I felt my body begin to relax as the liquor made its way through my system.

“What has a beautiful girl like you so worked up this evening?” His inquiry seemed more sincere than a pick-up line.

“It’s complicated.”

“Complicated? I’m pretty sure that’s chick-speak for man troubles.” A genuine smiled formed on my lips at his accurate intuition.

“I must be getting better at this flirting thing. You’re smiling again. Does the pretty lady have a name?”

I extended my hand to his, “Yes, actually I have two names. A first one and a last one. Emily Davis. Nice to meet you.”

He stared down at our joined hands. “Would you care to dance with me, Emily Davis?”

As my eyes poured over him I found myself saying why the hell not, even though the dance floor was as far as I planned on taking him tonight.

Noah’s hand rested on the small of my back, chastely guiding me through the crowd to the dance floor. There were a lot of people taking up space so we started to head to a spot where we would have room to move. When the last person moved out of the way, I turned to face my dance partner, but my eyes landed on Chase standing directly in between us. Blinking rapidly, I drew in an unsteady breath as his face darkened to a frightening shade of red.

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing, Emily?” The encounter had taken my dance partner and me by surprise, and left Noah to wonder if he should step in or step aside.

I crossed my arms in disbelief, and narrowed my eyebrows at him. “What the hell are you thinking? We are over, remember? What I do isn’t your concern.”

His eyes hardened even more causing me to second guess my outburst.

“Everything you do concerns me.” My breath hitched and my head jerked back by his admission. “Are you picking up a stranger, and hoping to have him replace me? Are you going to take him home tonight and fuck him?”

My jaw almost hit the floor as the stinging words left his mouth. Noah started to slide away from the confrontation, when he realized how ‘complicated’ things actually were. As far as confrontations go, this little scene was worthy of its own Jerry Springer episode.

A look of dismay filled Cassie’s eyes, as she, Liam and Nick came walking across the dance floor in response to my text. If he wanted to humiliate me and put on a show, then so be it.

“You know what, Chase, I hadn’t thought about that.” I cocked my head to the side and smirked, “Thanks for the advice. Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to go find Noah, so I can get you out of my system once and for all. And do me a favor, don’t show up at my apartment tonight, because I won’t be there.”

I turned on my heels to walk away, when Chase grabbed me from behind. Both Nick and Liam wisely grabbed and pulled his arms behind his back, effectively restraining him. His chest heaved and his veins started to bulge in his neck.

“You are not going anywhere with him.” He shouted as Cassie yanked my arm and pulled me through the crowd.

After we successfully made our way outside the door of the ballroom, Cassie spun on her heels while pointing an accusing finger into my chest. “What the fuck, Emily? What the hell was that all about?” Even Cassie was disappointed in me.

“I’m so sorry, Cassie. God. I can’t believe what this man is doing to me. I hate this person I’ve become. This isn’t who I am.” I said between sobs, as Cassie propped up my heaving body.

“It’s alright, Emily,” she said sympathetically, moving a strand of hair that was blocking my eye. “It’s not your fault. When two people care as passionately about each other as you and Chase do, you’re going to feel every emotion possible. Sometimes those feelings get all mushed together and it can be overwhelming. It’s like you can feel lust and loathing or love and hate, at the same time.”

“I don’t want to feel anything anymore, Cassie. The pain hurts so much; I just want to be numb.”

Like a protective mother, Cassie scooped me into her arms, kissing me on the top of my head and started walking me to the cabstand in the lobby. “While I’m sure the drinking tonight helped temporarily dull your pain, only time can start the process of healing your heart. Give your heart the time to heal.”

That was easier said than done. I stopped when I realized that she was getting into a cab with me. “You can’t leave. This is your big night and Liam’s inside waiting for you.’

Cassie rolled her eyes. “My work here is done. Besides I got my period this morning, so I won’t be needing Liam later.”

I sniffed and tried to bite back my laugh but it came out as a hiccup. “Well, what a relief. Now I don’t feel so bad.”

“Good,” she said while continuing to run her hands along my arms in a soothing gesture.

This pain I felt wasn’t like any other pain I’ve ever felt. Even though it was real and physical, there was no visible wound site. I felt like I was bleeding out from the inside.

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