One I know all too well.
Jesse’s hand flattens against my lower back. “And what do you need to thrive, Reagan Brady?”
“Things that aren’t as easy to come by,” I answer honestly. “You can give someone everything in the world, and it means nothing if you’re not present. If you don’t really care. If you aren’t listening. Material things are only worth the money you throw at them. Real investment costs more.”
He stares down at where my hand lands over his heart.
“Anyway, this isn’t about me.” I force a smile. “This is about you. And you’ve got Bea now. You’re great with her. A wonderful father.”
“I hope so.” He smiles so big that it’s breathtaking. “I was barely keeping myself together when she came around, and I wasn’t exactly prepared to be a dad. But I did the best I could. And when I couldn’t figure it out, Margaret was there to guide me.”
“I bet she was.”
Jesse grins, sweeping a rogue hair from my cheek. “It took a lot of learning on my end, but I’d do anything forthat little girl. She’s shown me family in a way my parents never did.”
“Do you want more kids then?” The second the question is out, I wish I could shove it back in my mouth.
At the same time, now that I’ve asked, I need to know.
It’s not like we’ve been careful about what we’ve been doing.
Jesse’s gaze drops to my mouth as I wet my lips. His thumb trails the bare skin of my shoulder, pausing long enough that I think he might not answer. When his stare once more meets mine, it’s filled with caution.
“Honestly, I was content with it just being me and Bea.” He rests his hands on my hips. “I figured I was good.”
“Past tense?”
“I—” Jesse’s mouth opens like he’s about to say more, but Ghost stops beside us, cutting him off.
“Got a hit on Lincoln’s car. Steel wants everyone back at the club.”
His statement is a bucket of ice water. The air chills as Jesse lets me go, putting distance between us. A cold reminder that Jesse already has enough curveballs in his life, and for Bea’s sake, he’s not willing to risk any more of them.
What we’re doing is fun for now, but he can’t offer me more. He can’t offer himself.
And knowing that the club is already making Lincoln their problem is proof I’ve stayed too long.
The club clears out of the bar, and we load into the vans. But driving back, there’s a bigger gap between me and Jesse on the long bench seat than there was when wewere driving downtown. He doesn’t put his arm around the back of my seat. His hands stay clasped in his lap. From the corner of my eye, I catch him occasionally glancing at me, and even if his knees hang wide so one of his touches mine, that’s all the contact he allows himself.
Like our conversation on the dance floor altered something we can’t get back.
His shoulders are tense until we near the compound, and only then does he relax back against his seat, leaning close enough that our arms brush.
Jesse looks down at me, and I wish I was strong enough not to melt when our gazes connect. I wish he would say something to make me stop falling for him. I wish I didn’t care about him and his daughter as much as I do.
Neither of us says anything. We just look at each other as we drive to the compound.
When we reach it, the van slows, so I assume we’re waiting for the gates to open. But after a long pause, there’s commotion outside that catches my attention.
Voices get louder, and panic starts streaming like static running in a current through the air.
Members start piling out of the van in front of us, and I get a sinking feeling about what Lincoln might have done. He found me at the bar. What if he finds me at the compound too?
“What’s going on?” Legacy leans forward to ask the prospect driving, but he’s already climbing out.
Through the windshield, I spot Havoc climbing out of the van ahead just as Chaos slides our door open.
Someone yells, and Jesse unbuckles so fast, he’s hopping out of the van while I’m still frozen.