Page 87 of Steel

Jameson is still talking to the officers, and even if everyone is calm, I sense the tension from across the parking lot.

Not that Jameson seems to let it get to him.

There’s something about how he commands a crowd that is undeniably intoxicating. He speaks to the cops with the full confidence of his patch, not caring that they’ll immediately judge him for it.

Jameson demands respect no matter what they think of him.

At one point, he motions to me sitting in the truck, but I’m too far away to hear what he’s saying. All I sense is the anger crashing out of him, no matter how calm he’s being.

I can’t figure out why he continues to fight for me, protect me, and stick up for me when he doesn’t even act like he likes me. But there’s security in watching him stick up for me in this moment.

After a few more tense words, the officers finally step back. They’re letting Sonny and Reyes go but don’t look happy about it. The cops watch them leave, and Jameson talks to them for a minute before they walk to where they’re parked.

Jameson swings the door open, climbing in the truck.

“Everything all right?” I ask.

He grips the steering wheel, drops his chin, and is clearly thinking about something. It takes a momentbefore he starts the engine, his gaze moving to where Austin is holding my hand.

“Everything’s fine.”

We both know he’s lying, but I don’t question him in front of Austin. Today is just one more thing weighing Jameson down. One more reason he’ll close himself off from me.

The drive back to the Twisted Kings compound is quiet, and I’m biting back everything I want to say for Austin’s sake. Jameson stops briefly at a burger joint, but we eat without saying much to each other.

Austin, thankfully, fills the silence for us, telling me about changing the oil in Jameson’s motorcycle and asking twenty questions about why pickle slices and relish don’t taste the same even if they’re both pickles.

Jameson surprises me by answering every single question. No matter how small or annoying. He keeps the mood up even when Austin refuses to concede his point. But between every half-hearted laugh, I sense the day weighing heavy on him.

At least he doesn’t let Austin see it.

By the time we get back to the house, it’s late, so I put Austin to bed. Pearl met up with her friends after the doctor so she’s still not back. And when I walk downstairs, it’s just Jameson and me again in the same awkward mess we’ve been in since we slept together.

“Thanks for picking us up, but you can go now if you need to.” I walk over to the sink and grab some water. “I’m sure you have things to take care of back at the club.”

“It’s fine.”

I tip my head back and let out an irritated chuckle. “Nothing’s fine, and you know it.”

“You’re safe here.”

I spin to face him, backing up to the counter and gripping it, trying not to scream when that’s all I want to do right now.

Let it out.

But I can’t.

Because there’s a child looking up to me, and for him, I need to keep it together.

“Safehere,” I repeat. “Safefor now.”

“What’s wrong with that?” Jameson grips the kitchen island, watching me.

“It’s all temporary.” I circle the island, meeting him where he is. “Being here is wearing on me, and just when I thought it was almost over, we’ve restarted the clock. When does it end? When is this over?”

“I don’t know.”

I roll my eyes. “Remember when I was the one with that answer and how you felt about it?”

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