Page 100 of Reckless Promises

36

Cillian

Daniel’s text came throughonly fifteen minutes ago, which means the doctor isn’t done running his test on Odette yet. I’m still not comfortable with the fact that she had to leave the room for this one, but I can’t risk anything going undetected, and Daniel wasn’t allowed to follow her.

I never should have left the hospital, and if I had any other choice, I wouldn’t have. But with the shipment coming in tonight, and Shane trying to figure out who did this to Odette, I had to make sure it was safe to bring her home before she was discharged.

Stepping through the hospital doors, the cool, sterile air hits me, and once more reminds me of my childhood. Every other week we’d be in here because someone was shot or dying or had a burst appendix.

Odette smiled so big when she found out about that. If I close my eyes now, I can still see her glow. And I miss that moment. Her in our room all to myself, somewhere no one can hurt her.

Deep inside, I know I’m the one who did this to her. And if I was smart, that might make me set her free, but I can’t let her go. I might have walked away yesterday, but the moment I left her side, realization slammed like concrete to my chest.

I need her.I love her.

There is no me without my wife.

I owe her an apology for being an asshole. I was so blinded by rage that I didn’t even bother to ask how she was feeling. Odette was poisoned, and I couldn’t bury the blackening rage long enough to see past my anger.

I’m not used to caring—and she makes me careso fucking muchit hurts.

I take the elevator to Odette’s floor and find my mom sitting in the waiting area talking to Michelle.

There’s still ten minutes until Odette will be back in her room, and every one of them stretches with things I should have said when I got the chance. If I thought I learned about regret after the death of my father, I was wrong.

“What are you doing here, Mom?” I stop in front of them.

Michelle stands at my approach. “I’ll get coffee and give you two a chance to talk.”

Her eyes flit to mine, and I know why Odette doesn’t like her. I’m not blind. I see how she looks at me—howshe’s always looked at me. But it doesn’t matter how pretty she thinks she is, all I see is just another woman who can’t hold a candle to Odette.

“What kind of question is that?” Mom pats the chair next to her, and I drop into it. “I’m not allowed to check in on my daughter-in-law? Don’t be rude, Cillian.”

It’s been over a day since I’ve slept, and it’s starting to wear my nerves thin.

“This is the first time I’ve seen you since the wedding. And we both know you don’t show up out of the goodness of your heart. So what do you want? And don’t tell me you’re here to talk about Fallon. I already told Michelle it’s not going to happen. I’m not trading her like a bargaining chip.”

Mom presses her lips tight, thinning them. “And why is that? It’s no worse than what you did.”

“You know I had my reasons.” Even if now, they don’t sound as valid as they once did.

“And I have mine. You don’t see her day in and day out, Cillian. Always distracted, doing whatever she wants. She needs something stable.”

“She just needs to grow up.”

“Exactly,” Mom bursts, but I don’t think she took my point like I meant it. “She needs to get married, give me grandchildren. Never thought I’d say this, but she needs to follow your lead. You didn’t want it either but look what it’s done for you. I see how you look at Odette, Cillian. I’m not blind. You like your wife.”

I love her.

“You say that like it’s a bad thing.”

“It’s not.” She shakes her head. “I’m happy you do. Better chance at getting a few grandbabies out of you.”

“Don’t push your luck.” I plant my hand over hers. “We’re happy with things the way they are for now.”

Odette and I have barely adjusted to each other, much less discussed kids. I never saw myself having them when the last thing I wanted to do was pass down my family’s problems to another generation.

But now that Mom’s planted the seed, it’s digging itself in. And the thought of being a father isn’t as off-putting as it used to be. I’m not my dad, and Odette is the most loving person I know. So if she did end up pregnant, would it really be that bad?

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