Page 19 of Worth the Trouble

“Not particularly, but I was outvoted.”

“Outvoted?”

I circle the couch and drop down beside her. Throwing an arm over the cushion behind her, I’m pretty sure her back stiffens even more.

“When we hit it big, the whole band built houses out here. I’d prefer a penthouse in the city or some shit, but those assholes wanted space.” I shrug.

Lili runs her hands up and down her thighs. “Are you all from around here?”

“Fairfield.” No matter how long it’s been, that city name still comes out through gritted teeth. “California.”

“Do you go back often?”

I tilt my head to the side, trying to remember the last time I’ve had a conversation with a woman that wasn’t going to lead to sex. But that’s why I don’t spend time around women like Lili. The last thing I need in my life is people asking questions or wanting to know things about me.

It’s unnerving, so I do what I do best, say something rude or obscene to push her away.

“You’re a curious kitten.” I grin, waiting for annoyance to paint Lili’s face.

But Lili doesn’t break my stare, she doesn’t frown or show much of a reaction. If anything, her eyes work like cogs in a wheel, spinning, as she tries to read me.

“You do that a lot, don’t you?”

I hitch an eyebrow. “What?”

“Deflect to avoid letting people in.”

I’m not sure when she turned to face me, but she is. Overconfidence bursting out of such a tiny body. Wide sweet eyes that are secretly devilish and trying to see through my bullshit.

“Guess you’d have to know me to get the answer to that.” I lean forward, bringing my elbows to my knees.

Her stare finally breaks as I cross my arms over each other, and for the briefest moment, they trace some of the tattoos on my forearms.

I’m sure she sees the scars. The tattoos only hide them so much, and while Lili is distracted in most situations, she seems keenly observant in others. And right now, her stare draws the pain to the surface.

Growing up like I did, it’s easy to forget your first wound or your last. It all bleeds together and most of it gets blocked out for self-preservation.

But there’s only so much one person can bury and forget, and Lili’s stare focused on my arm has my skin burning with memories.

The house is quiet, meaning one of two things. He’s either not here or too drunk to be stumbling around. The stench of smoke as I turn the corner indicates which, and I find him slouched in his chair in front of the television.

He’s watching it with the sound turned all the way down, and he probably doesn’t even realize it. His head is tipped back, and his eyes are shut, but the cigarette is firm between his fingers, so he isn’t asleep.

The empty whiskey bottle on the side table tells me I need to get the fuck out of here before he sees me.

“Rome.” His voice is tired and scratchy, filled with disgust like it always is.

Too late to run.

Too late to hide.

Doesn’t matter anyway. The devil has a way of finding you.

I step into the room without saying anything because one word is all it takes to tip the scales against me, and I’m never sure what word will set him off.

He opens his eyes and tips his head to the side to look at me.

They say the eyes are the door to a person’s soul but that’s assuming a person has one. Maybe that’s why my dad’s eyes are so dark and empty because all they lead to is the void I’m not sure was ever anything more than the black hole he lives in.

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