Page 21 of Forever and Ever

Walking off the stage, I pat Sebastian on the back and grin at him. “Good job getting the girl, buddy.”

“She showed up,” he says with a big smile.

He drops his chin and shakes his head, wagging around that floppy dark blond hair as he practically laughs in surprise. This dude is done for. Cassie is it for him, and that look on his face proves it.

I’d know because I’ve felt it twice in my life, even if it didn’t work out the way I wanted either time.

The first time I felt what they calllove at first sight, was when I met Kali at fourteen. Her family had just moved to town and her parents sat next to my parents in church. My leg brushed hers as she walked past, and I knew she was the girl I was going to marry. We shared candy, hung out by the tire swing, swam in the lake at sunset. All that stupid crap you see in movies. I was in love with her bright blonde hair and sugary sweet smile.

She was everything to me.

Only, I was young and an idiot, so I hadn’t quite figured out it wasn’t love. It was hormones. And I hadn’t quite learned that she wasn’t an angel at all, she was a fucking demon in a pretty sundress waiting to destroy my soul.

Fun times.

The second time I fell in love was the first time I laid eyes on the tattooed goddess who is currently walking toward me. Merry stepped into my dressing room without knocking and gave me that same unimpressed expression I’ve become all too familiar with. She shut me down on the spot, and that was only the first of many times that followed.

She’s dark, pessimistic, angry. The polar opposite of all things Kali, while being just as intent on never loving me back.

I’m a dumb fuck when it comes to my heart.

It’s been proven, not once, but twice.

So here I sit.

In purgatory.

“Good show,” Merry says, slugging me on the arm like I’m her big brother.

It pisses me off. Almost as much as it did earlier when I was digging a needle into her skin and still couldn’t seem to get through the thick ass barrier of hers.

She’ll sit naked in front of me, let me ink her beautiful skin, pass out in my bed. But that’s it—friends.

A year ago, I would have solved this problem with a pile of cocaine, maybe even a little heroin if the coke didn’t do the trick. Being clean blows when all I want to do is forget.

“Thanks,” I say, pulling my hair off my face and tying it in a knot at the base of my skull.

I’m sweating and gross but buzzing with energy.

“So, tour’s over,” Merry says, looking strangely nervous.

“Yep.”

Her face pinches and her eyes move to where I feel my jaw clenching. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.”

“Bullshit.” The faintest smirk that ticks up on the corner of her mouth only aggravates me more.

“It’s nothing,” I say again, getting annoyed.

The last thing I need right now is to get into it with Merry after I’ve been drowning in Sebastian’s love-struck mood all night. I’d like to say I’m not affected but seeing the way Cassie looks at him has brought out all my dumb ass feelings.

Besides, no good will come of this conversation with Merry. It’s the same drain we’ve spent the entire tour spinning around. Me, trying to convince her to give me a shot. Her, intent on shutting me down.

She doesn’t want to hear it, and I’m tired of repeating it to her in this moment.

Merry narrows those dark brown eyes, and they almost disappear with her thick lashes and eyeliner. Her teeth drag over her cherry-red bottom lip as she tries to read me, but all it does is get under my skin.

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