Page 5 of Heart Break Her

Merry looks the part of a girl who can be in the same orbit as rock stars. From what she wears, to how she holds herself with absolute confidence—she belongs here.

Unlike me, with my blonde hair—dyed bubble gum pink at the ends—and barely any makeup. If I were to spend too long around a band like Enemy Muse, I have no doubt they would eat me alive. Which is fine because, for me, a night out at one of their concerts is where I draw the line.

Honestly, I’m not sure what the appeal of their lifestyle is. Late concerts, even later parties, being in a different city every other day. It might look tempting from the outside—being handed whatever you want and the world worshipping you—but I’ve known people too close to this lifestyle to think that’s the extent of it.

I’m well aware it’s not all glitz and glamour.

There’s Merry, who dropped out of college seven months ago to join Enemy Muse’s crew. She said it was so she could follow her dreams of being a singer someday, but right now all she’s getting out of it is a constant headache while she does the band’s dirty work and cleans up their messes.

Then there’s my brother, who used to be one of Enemy Muse’s roadies. He loved every second of life on the road. But while his stories regaled the debauch lifestyle of having fun with the band’s leftovers, I’m well aware he enjoyed it a little too much. He partied a little too hard. And I saw how it ended.

So, while other people might look at the band’s life with stars in their eyes, I know the truth. Fly too close to the sun, and you will get burned.

“Get out of your head and take this shot,” Merry says, like she’s reading my mind.

She pushes the shot glass in my direction, and I take it from her, tipping it back and letting the liquid burn all the way from my lips to my stomach. If only it could take this past year with it.

“You’re right,” I tell her, slamming the glass back down and gritting my teeth. “Tonight is not about thinking. It’s about that show because holy shit,that show.”

“Incredible, right?” Merry grins, and I nod.

My head is still spinning from being in the same room as Enemy Muse. Directly across from my idol, Eloise Kane. Brilliant songwriter, gorgeous. And then there’s Sebastian. Photos do not do him justice.

He is…

Well, I can see why he probably never sleeps alone.

And every time I opened my eyes during the show, I swear I caught him looking at me. Although that’s probably how he makes all girls feel, being the center of the universe and all. One glance and I’m a black hole caving in on myself.

“It was amazing,” I say, still picturing them playing in my head as I take another drink.

I’ve been an Enemy Muse fan for years, ever since my brother introduced me to their music. He and I didn’t have much in common. Most of the time it felt like we were living such different lives we might as well have been speaking different languages, but music was where we could connect. It was our shared space. And from the moment I first heard Enemy Muse, they were my favorite. Something about Sebastian’s voice and the lyrics mixing together—I felt their music in my bones.

And tonight was something else entirely. Even if I’ve seen the band play a number of times at bigger venues, it’s the first time I’ve been this close to them.Reallyheard them.

It was transcendent. Otherworldly. My brother could have been sitting right there with me.

I felt everything.

“They’re the best for a reason.” Merry’s eyes fall over my shoulder, and I follow her gaze.

A woman is standing in front of the booth Rome and Noah have settled into, and she’s lifting up her shirt to show them her breasts.

Merry groans. “Even if they are annoying and childish.”

She reaches for her drink, and I avert my eyes, realizing none of this is out of the ordinary for her. I have no doubt Merry has seen it all, and she’s not the kind of girl who is easily fazed.

“He was drunk though, right?” I ask Merry.

“Sebastian?”

I nod.

“Always,” Merry says. “Supposedly he didn’t use to be like that. But I can’t say I believe it. I’ve seen Sebastian sober maybe a handful of times since I started working for them. He takes the lifestyle to another level.”

I’m pretty sure that should be a giant red flag. But as I watch Sebastian across the bar talking to his sister, it doesn’t scare me away. Because I don’t see a drunken mess. He just looks sad.

“If only he wasn’t so beautiful.” I turn back to Merry. “How is that even legal? To sound so good and look like him?”

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