Page 105 of Heart Break Her

“That’s fucking depressing, bro.”

Maybe it is, but it also means I don’t have someone constantly judging my every decision. Except for maybe Eloise.

“Regular people don’t understand this shit,” I say. “They want a piece of it in small doses, but they don’t get it.”

“What about you?” Myth leans back. “What does Adrian have you doing now that the tour’s over?”

“Writing, recording, fuck if I know. You’d have to ask him.”

Lately, I just go where they tell me, say what they ask me to, do what they want. I’m their puppet. It’s not that I don’t want the fame, but what comes along with it is a lot more than I was prepared for. Back when we were playing shows for free and barely able to feed ourselves as we traveled in a small van from town to town, at least we still had control. That’s long gone now.

“You’ll be back for the next one, right?” I look over at Myth.

“Fuck yeah,” he smiles. “Couldn’t keep my ugly ass away if you tried.”

“Good.”

Myth’s face softens, and he gives me a solid nod.

Besides the band, there’s not many people I’ve let get close to me. Myth being one of the few exceptions. From the moment he handed me his joint and said “Smoke this shit or I will, and I’m already in the fucking stars,” we’ve been friends. Dude is crazy.

He’s there for me.

He’s good people.

“When did you start messing around with nose candy?” Myth snatches a baggie off the coffee table and tosses it my direction.

“When did you start giving a crap about that kind of thing?” I narrow my eyes at him.

“Not judging,” Myth says. “But no one’s expecting shit from me, so it doesn’t matter what the fuck I do. You on the other hand…”

“Fuck ‘em.”

I’m getting tired of all the expectations. The label treats us more like commodities than people. Every year, I’m cutting out another piece of my soul and handing it over. Another part I’ll never get back.

It’s never enough.

“Just be careful, man,” Myth says, his green eyes holding my stare. I’m a little surprised by his comment. But he seems genuinely worried about the idea of me following the same path.

“I’m good. It was a birthday present from Mark. No big deal.” I shrug a shoulder.

I’m not sure what it says that roadies are always shoving drugs and pussy in my face to say happy birthday, but I’m not complaining.

Myth opens his mouth to say something, but a knock at the door distracts him.

“Takeout is here.” He winks.

I toss the bag of coke at him. “Like you’re one to talk? Fuck Megan a few times and suddenly you’re acting like you’re boyfriend material.”

“Yeah, yeah. Enjoy your blow job.” Myth stands, tucking the baggie in his pocket. “I’ll go get the party started without you.”

“Give me thirty minutes,” I grin.

Myth opens the door to the hotel room and the fine-ass blonde chick with a killer rack walks in, her curly-haired brunette friend right behind her. I can already picture their lipstick on my dick.

“Make it forty-five.”

Myth laughs at me, flipping me off before shutting the door behind him.

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