Page 98 of Iron Crown

“The wall is brown. So?” I played dumb.

He laughed again, but it was sadder this time. It was quieter, and fading into despair.

“I changed the walls to match your skin.” He reached out with his free hand, his thumb tracing over my cheek, his fingers lightly grazing the line of my jaw.

I knew that he wouldn’t stay harsh with me for long. It wasn’t in his nature.

“The board and batten was painted as dark as ash, glossy, with the pattern of waves to match the exact curl of your hair on our wedding day.” His fingers moved to play with a lock of my hair, twisting it around his index finger. “I remember every detail of you. It never faded. It never will. When you walk out of that door, you will take our son to a better life, far away from what damage I might do to him. What damage my father did to me.”

He wanted me to think he was insane. Maybe he was. Maybe a saner woman would think so. Maybe a normal woman would take these gestures of devotion and run for the hills.

“You deserve a man who loves you, Kira—”

“Ihaveahusbandwho loves me.”

“— a man who can love youcorrectly.”His eyes sparkled with unshed tears. He looked like the painting I had seen all those years ago, when I declared him a master. The self-portrait of himself in the dark, with an expression of profound remorse. “Obsession is a selfish thing, Kira. I am selfish.”

Instead, I tilted my head, burying my face into his palm, letting him caress me like I was a needy cat. I turned my face into his hand, kissing his scarred palm, where one scar was missing.

He loosened his grip on my wrist, and I pulled my hand back, grabbing him by the collar.

“Then be selfish,” I whispered, coming to my toes until our lips softly grazed together. “Be selfish now, husband, and hold me.”

He didn’t. He pulled out of my reach, stepping away like he was angry and afraid of me at the same time. The stubborn fool!

I stepped toward him, and he stepped away again, shaking his head.

“Kira, I’m begging you…” His voice was so shaky, it broke my heart. “If you stay, Cillian will become like me. He will be forced to marry a girl he doesn’t know, for an alliance that will poisonhim. Poisonus.This grand life of riches is as bleak and empty as any curse.”

“And I’m beggingyou,” I said, as a mad thought went through my mind. It was strange to be the one to pursue when he had always been the one to crowd into my space, and demand more of me than I thought I could give.

Maybe that was my fault. In fact, I was certain that it was my fault.

I had been withdrawn when he had sprinted in head first. Now our roles were reversed, and the only way we could remain intact was if I became what he needed me to be. I had to give him something that he wouldn’t question.

“Don’t turn away from me, love,” I whispered, as a plan formed in my mind. “I beg you, don’t—”

“I have to go,” he said, his eyes on the ground as he walked around me, dodging me as I reached out to grab him.

“Eoghan, don’t you dare walk away from me!”

I sounded like I was the insane one, and not him.

He didn’t listen. He just calmly walked out the door, gently shutting it behind him.

He was cool, calm, and determined.

Well, fuck that shit.

I ran into the closet, found an emerald green dress that had enough sway on the skirt for a thigh holster. I picked practical,flat black shoes that were probably some kind of designer thing worth more than my old New York City apartment, and ran down the stairs after him.

He was at the cars, giving orders to O’Malley, who still wore a cast over his right arm, which he’d hurt in the blast, and Shiny, when I caught up, running to his side.

I smiled, trying to catch my breath from my little sprint, before I walked beside him, as if nothing was wrong. As if I didn’t have a care in the world.

“Kira,” he reprimanded, his voice low and agitated.

“Eoghan,” I said sweetly, smiling for the sake of our audience.