Page 16 of Owen Gardner is Losing It

“That a drinking game?” Xander asked.

“You’ve never played?” Beth reached up to remove her dandelion crown, putting it on the hay bale between us. “You make a statement starting with ‘never have I ever’, and anyone who has done it has to drink.”

“There’s not a lot Xander hasn’t done,” Abigail said with a laugh. She sat on the plastic patio chair beside him. “He’s in trouble.”

Xander’s eyes found mine. “Gardner’s going to be the most sober person here.”

A few people laughed, including Beth, but I held Xander’s stare with a straight face. Was I wrong in assuming that wasyet another subtle dig at me? What was he playing at? Was I just imagining the constant jabs, or was he actually trying to undermine me in front of Beth?

With a sly smile, Beth cleared her throat and said, “I’ll start. Never have I ever… been attracted to anyone in this circle.” She gestured toward the people sitting around the fire, many of whom raised their cups or bottles and took a drink. I picked up my own beer cup from between my feet and took an enthusiastic gulp, looking over at Beth. She, too, was taking a drink–and staring right back at me.

Instinctively, I stole a quick glance across the fire at Lena just in time to see her swallow.

“Um, not to be a stickler for the rules,” Abigail said, tucking her hair behind her ears. “But aren’t you supposed to state something youhaven’tdone, so everyone but you has to take a drink?”

“I think you’re right,” Lena said.

Abigail turned to her. “Do you want to go next?”

“Sure, I guess.” Lena sat up a little straighter, yanking on the hem of her skirt. And then she looked directly at me. “Never have I ever ditched class to go get high at Boomer’s.”

My mouth dropped open. “Not fair!” I declared with a laugh before taking a drink, smiling at Lena over my cup. A few others raised their cups, too–Abigail and Xander included.

Beth jabbed my arm. “I knew you were fucked up when you talked to me today.”

“Yeah,” Xander said, his voice carrying across the entire yard. “This guy was crying about missing his chemistry test, but I wouldn’t take him back to school until he talked to you.”

Now I knew I wasn’t imagining it. I tried to force out a laugh, but I couldn’t even muster it. Irritation surged through me instead, and I was ready to knock Xander down a notch. “Someof us actually give a shit about our grades and our future,” I muttered.

In the glow from the fire, I saw a flicker of something on Xander’s face–surprise? Embarrassment?

Holding his stare, I decided to take a turn at the game. “Never have I ever hit on a student teacher who was six years older than me–so persistently that I had after-school detention for it and she had to transfer to another school to finish the semester.”

After a brief hesitation, Xander lifted his cup to his mouth and took a drink. Several people laughed–even Abigail.

“Youdidn’t,” Beth teased.

Xander smiled with a confident shrug. “What can I say? I have a way with older women.”

That motherfucker. I’d meant to embarrass him, but it backfired–the other guys sitting around the fire praised him, recounting stories of how hot Miss Johansen was. Xander was basking in the attention, but it didn’t stop him from looking across the fire at me to assess my reaction. His smile faded–he understood the game now. The game between us.

“Never have I ever gotten a boner in Mrs. Gruber’s class,” he said, keeping his eyes locked on me, “and had to make my friend stay with me after the bell rang because I couldn’t stand up.”

My face felt warm, and it wasn’t from the flames.

“Oh wow,” Beth giggled. “You really do like science.”

A few others laughed.

“That was years ago,” I said, trying to join in the laughter to hide my growing humiliation. “Puberty was a weird time.”

I couldn’t dare look at Lena, who had sat beside me in Mrs. Gruber’s class at the time–and was the reason for my erection. I didn’t take a drink, either, which nobody pointed out. “That’s adorable,” Beth said.

I didn’t want to be adorable to her.

The rage simmering inside of me threatened to erupt. Xander was supposed to be my friend–was supposed to help me lose my virginity that night–but his incessant need to assert his dominance had taken over. He was now working to destroy any chance I had with Beth by making me look as pathetic as possible in front of her. All while ignoring the sweet redhead beside him who would give him anything he wanted, if he would just open his fucking eyes.

I was sick of it.

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