Page 31 of To Have and To Hold

He stared, his eyes dropping to her mouth for a second before coming back up to meet hers. “I don’t have my books here with me, I came quickly over after my shower when practice was done. So, I will need to share yours. You don’t mind, do you?”

She had to smother a laugh. Colin was slick. “Sure, I don’t mind, here.” She placed her English and science books in front of him. He looked back at her questioningly. “I don’t need them. I have my notes I can use as we go through all the troubled areasyou need help with.” She smiled and moved her chair away from him, turning it slightly around so that they were facing each other.

Colin grinned and shrugged his shoulders and every afternoon after classes in the library was when she learned Colin was more than he seemed, that he was actually very smart and not just your typical jock hoping to get a scholarship and move on into the big leagues. She later learned that he had fallen behind in his courses because he’d missed a lot of school throughout the beginning of the year and that he and his younger brothers were being tutored as well.

She leaned back on the hotel pillows and a small smile graced her lips as she remembered the first time they’d kissed. Coco was waiting for him in their usual spot in the library for him to come and tell her what mark he got on his science exam. When he showed up, he looked all defeated and couldn’t look her in the eye as if he couldn’t bear disappointing her.

Coco had taken his hand, giving it a squeeze. “It’s okay, we will try something else, ask for an extra assignment and work a little longer to get your grades up in science.”

“Do you know that this is the first time you have touched me and all it took was failing?” Colin had said, his voice low.

“Huh. What?” Coco had tried to not roll her eyes and went to release his hand, but he turned it around clasping it firmly in his warmth.

“Coco, there is something I want to say to you and it’s about this exam.”

Her shoulders slumped; she had never failed at getting her students to get the grades they wanted and was feeling out of sorts by what just happened to him. He was probably going to ask to be assigned to another tutor.

“I passed with an A, and it is all thanks to you.” He whipped out the paper with the A on it and held it up for her to see.

She had rushed to him, giving him a hug and they both turned their heads at the same time, their lips accidently brushing against each other. They froze and then his mouth was on hers, tenderly moving over her lips before pulling away. His eyes were dark now with a question, and she moved closer to him and pressed her lips to his, giving in to her feelings. He had never made a move on her and treated her as a friend and tutor. The only time he had been a bit flirtatious was the first time at the library and she had acted the same around him.

But the way his lips had moved across her own and his hand had put hers against his fast-beating heart told her a different story. His heart was racing for her. His other hand went to cup her jaw, holding her in place and she made a small sound in her throat as Colin delved deeper into the kiss. He pulled slightly away and groaned when she raised up on tippy-toes to continue the kiss. He pulled further away and rested his forehead against hers.

“If we don’t stop and slow down, we are going to get kicked out of this library.” He had warned. She stared, her heart still racing alongside his, her breath catching as he continued to rub his thumb across her jaw and then over her mouth.

“Do you know how long I have wanted to do this?”

He had lowered his head, and his mouth began seeking hers again as if he couldn’t help himself, stealing her breath with the intensity of the kiss and she was the one to step away, turning her head.

“I won’t sleep with you if that is what you are trying to do.”

He then turned her face back around to his. “I won’t lie and say that it isn’t what I want but I can try to be good and respect your wishes until you are ready.”

She pulled completely away from him and was about to shake her head “no.” She knew he could easily weaken her resolve, and she wanted to be married or in a committed relationship leading to marriage first.

“How about we just start by going out to celebrate over a burger and ice cream and my getting an A and for you being an amazing tutor.”

She had run her gaze over his face, seeing him smile down at her, happiness over his accomplishment shining over him and how proud he was.

“Please, I promise you will be safe with me. Come on.” He gave her a quick kiss on the lips and gathered her books, putting them in her knapsack while he chatted away about how grandfather was going to be proud of him.

She had stood there, watching him and then whispered low to herself, “What about my heart?”

Coco threw off the covers, tired of her thoughts bringing back bittersweet memories of their time together. She’d been right to be cautious, and she was right now to not give in to fantasy. This was not going to end like a fairytale for her. Despite how it looked to others on the outside.

She paused as she sat on the edge of the bed. She had to admit to herself that the kisses back then were that of a young adult; the kisses Colin was giving her now were of a grown man needing his woman, cherishing his woman, loving his woman. That he wanted and needed her touch, her nearness, that he treasured her laugh, her smile. His eyes were alwaysseeking hers across the room, standing near or close and he was capitalizing on all opportunities to touch her or hold her.

Damn it, she couldn’t fall for him all over again because she didn’t know what she would do if he walked away with her heart again.

“I can’t think about this anymore. I need a distraction.” She sighed and glanced at the clock. It was six in the morning and the others were still asleep; she made her way over to her suitcase and spotted the bright pink band from the strip joint they went to last minute.

When Colin found them, he was not happy and had escorted them with the help of Abbott out of the club.

Jackie’s face had been soured the whole ride back and she let the men have it in the taxi heading back to the hotel. She could understand Jackie being moody because she thought she’d finally found the one and for her sake she hoped that Keith would come around and they could work out whatever it was.

Coco opened the door and paused because right across from her was Jackie trying to sneak in wearing the same outfit as last night.

Chapter 16

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