Page 37 of Surviving Midnight

She shakes her head. “It’s fine. She left me when I was sixteen and I haven’t heard from her since.”

I blink, then do it again.

“What gets me is the fact that she died last week, already cremated and gone, and I only got the call because they found a copy of my birth certificate mixed in with her mail. Her landlord is the one who tracked me down. He didn’t even know she had a daughter.”

Wow.

Just fucking wow.

“If she didn’t have that, I never would have known what happened to her.” Theo laughs but it’s hollow. “She was living in Pensacola, alone. Died of an opiate overdose.”

“Jesus, honey... I’m not sure what to say.”

She shrugs. “Me either. I thanked her landlord, told him to get rid of her stuff and left it at that.” Another tug on the bottle. “The worst part of today though, god, that almost beats finding out my mom croaked?”

I take the bottle from her because Blondie is one more drink away from being smashed with her tiny frame, set it back on the rack then lead her to the couch. “What else happened?”

“Marion called me.” Those glowing amber eyes flick to mine. “The woman my ex was cheating with.”

My hackles instantly raise and my hands ball into fists. I’m sure this conversation is going to be some weird mix of wanting that asshole back, feeling bad for the other parties involved, and ultimately letting those awful people walk all over again. People do that shit, I’ve seen it before with some of the other guys’ old ladies. They forgive horrible transgressions committed against them, end up back in the same situation and wind up feeling like they were the bad guy in all of it.

Then again, Theo isn’t just any girl, she’s the perfect woman and I’m sure she has the ability to surprise me still.

“What’d she have to say?” I should win a gold fucking medal for keeping the anger out of my voice.

Theo waves her hand through the air dismissively as she sinks to the cushions. “She called because she’s feeling guilty. Marion wanted forgiveness for sleeping with my ex-boyfriend the entire time he’s been in Colorado then went on to tell me he had a side piece the two years before that while he was in Philadelphia. A man that time.”

I might just make a trip to Denver and find that law firm, maybe take a few of the guys with me and scare the pants off of this asshat, then beat the shit out of him.

“So out of six years, the only time Tony was faithful to me was when we lived in the same city. And I can’t even say that for sure. I told Marion I hope she’s happy with her choices, told her none of them deserve my forgiveness, kindly asked her to never call me again then told her to go to hell.”

I smirk just a little because fuck, I reallyreallylike this woman.

Theo starts picking at the hem of her shorts and sniffles. “And while I genuinely wish them all the happiness in the world”—here it comes, the bigbutabout still being in love with her ex—“as well as all the STDs they can possibly get”—maybe not—“I can’t help but feel like I should take today as a sign.”

My brow furrows, furrows hard. “What are you talking about?”

“Something my mother said in the note I found the day she left. ‘You’ll never amount to anything, Theodora. People will look at you and see exactly what I see; someone who isn’t worth their time and effort, a waste of space, an unlovable little girl who will never be enough for someone to stick around.’” A few tears roll down her cheeks. “That’s why I was crying. My mother was right. I’ve never known my dad because he took off before I was born, my mom abandoned me when I was a sophomore in high school and pretended like she didn’t have children right up until she died. The only long-term relationship I’ve ever had turned out to be a total sham because he didn’t think I was worth being faithful to or making a future with. Tony can fuck off and I hope my mother rots in hell, but it’s hard to think there wasn’t any truth to her words when the supporting evidence is piling up left and right. Getting both of those phone calls today just reminded me of what she said all those years ago and I can’t really help but find some truth to it.”

Goddamnit.

And I didn’t help one fucking bit by bolting the second shit got a little too real.

Theo sniffles and forces a smile through her tears. “You’re the only person that’s ever fought for me, Zak, and even you…”

Nope.

She’s wrong and I won’t let her think she’s right, let alone say it.

Which is why I take Theo’s tear-stained face in my hands and crush my mouth to hers. She squeaks in surprise, tenses for a few seconds then this fucking perfect sweet angel melts into me, melts into my kiss and fuck me if that isn’t a beautiful thing.

Lightning strikes with every heartbeat.

Sparks ripple against my skin.

My fingers tangle in the disheveled white-gold strands of silk, bury themselves in her hair as I tilt her head and deepen the kiss.

“I’ll fight for you, honey.” I let my truth caress her lips. “I’m not good enough for you, but I will always fight for you and maybe one day I can be the man who is enough, the devil who changes his ways so he can keep an angel.”

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