Page 128 of Windlass

Stevie flinched. “I guess I asked for that.”

“You did.” Angie tucked a strand of Stevie’s hair behind her ear with an affectionate smile. “Very foolishly.”

“Please let me help pay for the roof.”

“I’ll consider it on one condition,” Angie said.

“Can it be a sexy condition?”

“You’re trying to cheer me up, which is adorable, but I’m the asshole here.” Angie’s mouth scrunched the way it did when she was being too hard on herself. “You can help me figure out the roof and the rest of the bills if you really want to inflict that on yourself. But you have to promise you won’t put yourself into trouble to help me out.”

Stevie held up a pinky. “I pinky swear I won’t ruin my good credit in case one of us needs to apply for a loan or a new place to live. Call me Plan B.”

“Because you shrivel sperm?”

“Yes, Angie, because I shrivel sperm.” Stevie gently pried Angie’s thighs apart and wiggled closer so she could wrap her arms around Angie’s waist and nestle into her cleavage. To Angie’s breasts, she murmured, “Please let me care for you. I want to. It makes me happy.”

Angie’s chin settled on the crown of Stevie’s head as Angie’s arms wrapped around her in return.

“Okay,” said Angie. “I’ll try.”

“Oh, I wasn’t talking to you.”

“I will bite you in the head.” Angie laughed despite her threat, and while she might have been right in her assessment of Stevie’s use of humor, in this instance she wanted to hear that sound more than anything. Stevie kissed the skin beneath her lips and tasted Angie’s stress in the salt.

“Stevie?”

Stevie looked up somewhat unwillingly. “Yeah?”

“There’s something else I want to tell you, but I’m not ready to say it because I don’t want to scare myself away, but I need you to know that I want to say it and have wanted to say it for a long time, but I’m a cowardly chickenshit who can’t handle strong emotions.”

Stevie chased the run-on sentence through her head a few times to parse the meaning, to double-check her interpretation, and triple-check it in case she exploded with joy only to have to assemble her bits and pieces back together in shame.

Slowly, she straightened enough to look Angie directly in the eyes, ignoring the unpleasant sensation of gritty concrete on her knees. Unshed tears glistened over those hazel pools. She kissed each eyelid, then kissed the single tear that fell from those long black lashes.

Should she wait? Give Angie more time? Agreeing to openly date had already been a huge leap, and that had happened only the previous night. Stevie could be patient a little while longer.

Looking into Angie’s face, however, with its hidden hurts and perfect spirit, she couldn’t bear the thought of swallowing those words another time. She could be patient, but there were some things Angie needed to hear as often as Stevie could find breath to say them so that someday she might believe herself worthy of it.

“If there was something I wanted to say, too, but haven’t because I don’t want to scare you off, would you mind ifIsaid it or would you rather I wait? It’s not like it’s news. Everyone already knows. But I’ll wait for you. I’ll always wait for you. It’s a character flaw.”

A sob shook Angie’s shoulders. Just one before she regained her composure.

“You can say it,” she said in a whisper.

“You sure?” Stevie asked.

“I’m sure.”

“Cool.” Stevie’s heart pounded ferociously. “I love you too, Angela Rhodes.”

Angie’s smile really was the single most brilliant thing in the universe. Stevie felt corny thinking it, but decided she liked corn, and she liked Angie and she didn’t give a shit. Angie loved her. Angela Rhodes loved her.

“Now that we’ve established that, do you want me to make you something to eat?” she asked, not wanting to overwhelm Angie by loitering in emotion’s doorway. The lightness in her chest was too much to contain. “Mac and cheese?”

“You wish.” Angie leaned forward, and Stevie met her halfway. The kiss Angie gave her was slow and deep and tasted a bit like tears.

It was perfect.

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