Page 102 of Spindrift

“Wedon’t deserve them.”

“Wereally don’t.” Stevie shook her head and stared into Olive’s large brown eyes.Olive looked up at her with trust and pain and confusion.

Morganand Abby conferred for a while. Stevie talked to Olive, and Emilia braided herlong mane for something to do with her hands. The coarse texture of manebrought up childhood memories of horseback riding lessons, and she rememberedthe farm her father would take her to in the summer, with its old lesson horsesand the grizzled instructor. Her father had watched her ride around and aroundin circles with pride filling his eyes.

Forgivenesssavaged her, ripping into her body with a pain that made her gasp. Stevielooked up in alarm, and Emilia shook her head, unable to speak as her handtightened around Olive’s mane.

Herfather had loved her. His drinking had stolen him away from her, but he hadloved her, and he had been proud of her, and that was what she had now: thememory of his love.

“Emilia?”

“I’m. . .” she started to say she was fine, but stopped herself. “My dad. He likedhorses.” An idiotic statement, and yet, here in the mud with a dying mare, shecould not find any other words. His love scorched her. Missed opportunitiessparked, flared, and burned out, along with some of her anger and resentment,charred pieces landing on the exposed parts of her heart. Her father had lovedher, and now he was gone.

“I’llpay for half her treatment,” Emilia found herself saying to Stevie.

Stevie’smouth fell open.

“GetAbby to sign her over to you.”

“Emilia—”

“Youtwo belong together if you want it.”

Furrowssprung up on Stevie’s brow. “I could talk to Ange. We could fence off part ofthe orchard, and there’s an old hoop house we could use as a run-in.” She heldEmilia’s eyes. “I can’t ask you to pay for her treatment, though.”

“Canyou pay for it yourself?”

“No,but—”

“Thenlet me help. Please.”

“Why?”

BecauseI can’t bear to lose anything else.It wasn’t a professional thought. It wasn’t even a rational thought, but shecould not take the feeling that death followed her everywhere and it seemedcrucial suddenly that this horse live. She felt the way she had when she was achild begging fate for favors:If the next car that passes is blue, myparents will get back together. If this horse lives, everything will turn outokay.

“BecauseI want to feel like I’ve done something good.”

Lightblue eyes, so different from Morgan’s, held hers, and Emilia understood as sheheld them why that friendship had lasted over the years. Stevie might prank andclown, but beneath that veneer she sensed the same intensity and sensitivitythat drove Morgan. Stevie nodded once as if she’d heard the words Emilia hadnot said aloud.

“Ifyou change your mind, I can always open up a payment plan. You’re not bound tothis.”

“Fairenough.”

Steviedug her phone out of her pocket and dialed Angie. Emilia listened to theirconversation with half an ear. She felt light and heavy all at the same time,like she might drift away in slow motion if she wasn’t careful.

Steviehung up with a dazed expression.

“Whatdid she say?” Emilia asked.

“Shesaid yes.”

Shehadn’t expected Angie to say no. Stevie, however, appeared stunned. Taking on ananimal was always a big decision, and horses were a thousand pounds ofresponsibility with legs and bodies that seemed designed to fail. This couldbeggar Stevie, but Emilia did not point out what Stevie knew.

Morganturned back to them as the resolve in Stevie’s face hardened.

“Stevie,I need you to—”

“Morgan.”