Page 18 of Crescendo

“Hm?” I raised an eyebrow, and she settled back in her seat as the food started coming out, eggs Benedict for Bansi set down and a big Belgian waffle for Hannah. With the sudden line drawn between me and Eliza, though, the table practically didn’t notice, watching the two of us as Eliza spoke.

“You can’t aspire to something in your past. Everyone knows that. If you want to move forward, you have to move forward. To something you haven’t done before.”

I stared at her for a second before I settled into a smile. “That’s cute that you’re concerned about me.”

Eliza smiled a little wider. “Just that you’ll need it, Lydia Howard Fox.”

“I get it, I get it. I’m Lydia Howard Fox. I know. Stop saying the whole thing. Then I guess my aspiration… to try something new,” I said. “To discover something I haven’t. And maybe… find where my passion lies right now,” I said, with my eyes drifting inexplicably towards where Ella was looking at me, and where our eyes locked for an electric second.

Wasn’t that inexplicable after all, of course. She was the one bubbling with passion—but only barely bubbling on the surface, where you couldn’t see a lot of it but you could tell it meant there was explosive pressure under the surface. And maybe me trying to teach her as much music as I could wasn’t just for her, but trying to get at that wellspring of passion, trying to see for myself what made a person burst with inspiration like that.

Of course, she was also damn pretty, so I guess maybe I just liked to look at her. But also, I’d stared for a second too long, so I passed it off with a, “That leaves you, Ella. What’s yours?”

Ella quirked a smile, still holding my gaze for one more charged second before she looked away. “A few,” she said. “One is to learn enough that I don’t get publicly roasted at breakfast.” The table all laughed around her, and she rode the laughter with, “Two is to find what I like. I’m still so new to this that I want to develop my… my taste, my ideas. And three—” She sat up taller, raising her drink high. “Three is to figure out something about Lydia I can use to embarrass her in return.”

The table burst into laughter and chatter, and I met her drink with mine. “I cannot wait to see what you come up with,” I said. “A lot rolls right off of me! I’m looking forward to seeing what really sticks in my feathers!”

“Oh, I know,” Ella said with a mischievous smile my way. “Don’t worry. It’ll be something good, just for you, Lydia.”

I really hoped this girl was straight. It was a little too nice hearing my name in her voice. I didn’t need the issues that would come with finding out she was gay. She wore shoes that were a little too comfortable to be regular straight-woman shoes, but I put it down as being a doctor instead.

“Here’s to bringing me down, beating me, and humiliating me,” I said, and the whole table clinked their glasses to that.

We dug into our meals, all chattering to one another—Eliza and Hannah sticking more to the two of them, and Bansi talking as much as the rest of us combined. We were finishing up when a girl approached the table shyly—younger, probably just graduated college and straight into this program, a short brunette with a nervous expression and an accent that was British but I couldn’t tell where from.

“Hi there,” she said. “I don’t mean to bother you, but—well—you’re Lydia Howard Fox, aren’t you?”

“I’ve been frequently informed that I am, yes,” I said, and the girl took a sharp breath.

“Oh—I’m a really big fan of yours. A really big fan. I love your soundtrack fromThe Other Woman.I listened to the whole thing basically on repeat while I was revising for my final exams.”

I beamed. “That’s an ominous soundtrack. I guess finals were rough.”

She laughed awkwardly. “Well, yes, maybe. It was a dark time. But—but I’m just a really big fan, and—could I—well, I don’t want to bother you, but would it be okay to ask for your autograph?”

I grinned, turning in my chair to face her. “I’ll do you one better,” I said. “How about an autograph from me and Ella? She’s my partner in music for the time being. Way more special than just a regular old autograph from little old me.”

Ella put her hands up, blushing hard. “You don’t need to—” she started, but the girl lit up.

“Would you really?”

“I’m… not worth signing anything,” Ella laughed awkwardly, but the girl gave her a starry-eyed look.

“If you’re working with Lydia Howard Fox, I’m sure you are. Why else would she work with you?”

“You think I know why Lydia does what she does?” she muttered, with that tone like she didn’t mean to say it, but the girl just laughed, and a second later, I got Ella to give the girl a signature with me, and she stopped for a selfie with me and the whole group at the table too, Eliza posturing in the background with her shoulders drawn back and a very calculated angle of her chin that I assume she thought made her look the poshest possible, and Hannah breaking character to pose with double peace signs.

Once the fan, who’d introduced herself as Rosie and gushed some more about how much she loved my work and how she was so excited to be in a program with me, had left us to our own devices, Ella gave me a helpless look.

“Really, you’re setting me up to embarrass myself,” she laughed.

“Then I guess you’ll have to practice,” I said with a wink. “I mean, what do you have to be afraid of?”

“I’m notafraidof anything,” she laughed, “just—”

“Aren’t you, though?” I said and she stopped, looking at me oddly.

“What?”

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