Page 33 of The Drummer

She shakes her head, and my stomach drops.

“Not that I’ve seen.”

It was a longshot anyway.

“Okay. We’ll have to do that, too. Let me get some water. Hang on.”

I push to my feet and head to Luke’s bathroom. Hopefully, there’s a spa kit. If not, a garbage bin will work. I’m relieved to see a basin filled with personal care amenities.

After dumping them out, I return to Callie and hold it out to her.

I cringe at her confused look. Yeah, this is definitely not how I was hoping our night would go when it started. Should have just kissed her.

“It’s for soaking feet, but in case you need this before I getback,” I explain. “I’ll be right back with the water as soon as I can.”

I take off with a new sense of urgency.

After gathering some supplies from the party and ducking out of several conversations, I return to Luke’s room for the well-rehearsed marathon. I hate how quickly it all comes flooding back.

Callie’s gaze darts to me from where she’s seated beside Luke on the bed. With my hands full, I kick the door closed behind me and lean over him.

“Gonna be a long night,” I explain as I motion for her to take the plate of snacks and bottle of water balancing on my left arm. “Sorry, they didn’t have French toast.”

The worry lines ease on her face when she laughs. It’s amazing how much that sound affects me. It’s like a high I want to keep chasing.

She scoots closer to Luke on the bed, leaving room for me on her other side. I place the rest of the snacks on the nightstand and join her. We’ll need to get the poison out of Luke soon, but first I have to build my strength for that behemoth task.

I align myself beside Callie and free a heavy sigh. I hadn’t even realized how much tension I was holding onto until I let myself take a breath.

Our eyes meet in the mirror on the wall across from us. It could be awkward. Maybe it is, I don’t know, but after a few seconds, it feels like I need to say something.

I even know what that thing should be.

“I’m sorry about how I acted out there,” I begin quietly. “It hurts, you know? Seeing him like this. Sometimes I’m not strong enough to deal with it the way I should. I try to pretend he’s the same person now that he was then, but he’s not.”

Her brows knit. “Messing around with supermodels?”

The true weight of this situation presses down on me. “Thatwouldn’t have been a cause for concern a year ago. But you were right to be worried. It doesn’t mean now what it meant then. It’s just…”

God. I don’t even know what I’m trying to say. I study the ceiling, unable to look at her or myself in the mirror. I still haven’t sorted all of this out, so I’m not sure how I’m supposed to explain it to someone else. All I know for sure is that I love this man beyond logic, and it’s the hardest thing I’ve ever faced.

“I want to help him, I do, I just don’t know how. At some point...” I turn my head to meet her eyes directly this time. “How can I help him if he won’t even let me? You remember what happened at breakfast. He doesn’t want to be helped. I’d be here every day if he let me.”

Warmth spreads through my hand, and I glance down to see her palm tucked against mine.

I don’t know what to do at first. Instinct warns me to pull away. I’ve been touched plenty of times, too many times, but this feels different. There’s no lust or expectation, just gentle compassion to remind me she’s here.

Whoisthis person?

My gaze flickers to Luke with a silent apology.

I get it now, dude. I really do.

This girl just creeps into your life and starts exploding shit with her light.

A peace I haven’t felt in a long time settles over me, and I find my thumb moving in lazy arcs over hers, as if seeking more of it.

“What about you?” she asks, breaking the long silence.

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