Page 138 of The Drummer

Her wide eyes lock on me, and the words echo through my head.

I love you for it.

Shit. Is that why she’s stunned?

But when her gaze crosses to Luke, I breathe a sigh of relief. As usual, she’s just in shock we want her in our world. I’m going to have to buy a damn billboard to get the message across.

“He’s got a point,” Luke says. “Besides, our security team needs to stay with us. Things could get dicey.”

Her soft laugh flows over me like a warm breeze. “Okay, okay. But I’m going to be the best darn bootleg-recording-thwarter you’ve ever seen.”

Bootleg-recording-thwarter?I shake my head with a grin.

Holding out my hand, I give her the sternest negotiator expression I can generate. “Deal. But only if you promise to work on more songs while you’re waiting to thwart.”

She takes my hand, her gaze locking on mine with a glint of mischief. “Deal. But only if you promise to make-out with me on your breaks.”

I almost choke as the guys burst out laughing. A lifetime wouldn’t be enough to sort out the surprises in this woman.

“I knew there was no way you could handle her,” Sweeny snorts, slapping me on the shoulder. “Called that.”

He did. He’s also an ass. Good thing for him he’s one of the best guitarists I know.

Eli and Sweenyleave the hotel on a mission “to make new friends” while the rest of us wait for the trailer to arrive.

Callie wants to “freshen up” back in the suite, which leaves Luke and me alone in the empty concrete storage space.

The previous echo of activity that burst with excitement and life suddenly feels cavernous.

We study the floor and walls in silence, neither of us sure about what comes next.

“Kind of feels like we’re back in the basement, huh?” he says finally.

A weak smile flickers on his lips, triggering one in me. “Yeah. Guess we’ve gone full circle. All we need is your aunt’s stack of holiday decorations and expired canned goods. Do you think she’ll show up with popsicles and fruit punch?”

I wince at my slip, but he doesn’t withdraw into a shell like I expect at the reference to his aunt. He almost seems amused. I’m positive this topic would have sent him fleeing to his room just a few weeks ago.

“She definitely won’t,” he says dryly. “I doubt I’ll ever hear from her again. I’m officially an orphan.”

“You already were an orphan. This makes you a… double orphan?”

He smirks at the floor and shakes his head. “Maybe.”

His gaze takes that glassy far-off look he gets when he loses himself in his head. I know that place well. Not only the recesses of my own mental abyss, but his. We’ve shared more history than blood brothers. Probably more pain and heartache too.

With his hands shoved in the pockets of his sweatpants and dark hair hanging in his eyes, it’s easy to see remnants of the seventeen-year-old boy who’d been my rock and my hero since the moment we met. No one messed with me at school after Luke came into the picture. Almost overnight, I transformed from bullied band nerd to enigmatic sidekick. Even my father backed off to some extent when Luke was around.

His hypnotic aura that captivates the masses isn’t new. It’s not the result of celebrity, but what led to it. People naturally fear him and want to be around him at the same time. He’s larger-than-life. The kind of person who never quite fits in the moment because he’s too much for this world.

He was a quiet supernova, and for most of my life, my star orbited his. When I lost him, I lost more than a good friend. I lost my point of reference. A year later, I still hadn’t found my way.

“You may be an orphan, but you have a family,” I say, breaking the long silence.

His eyes dart to mine, and I shrug. “A big one. More than that.”

With a deep breath, I turn to him. We can’t dance around the truth anymore.

“I don’t think you understand the colossal void you left in my life when you disappeared,” I say as old frustration returns. “I know your lying brain has been telling you we’d be better off without you, but I’m telling you that’s bullshit. This past year has been hell, and not just because of the external crap I had to deal with. Trying to do life with a huge chunk of your heart and soul missing? That’s the real pain. That’s the part that was breaking me.”