Page 60 of Redd

He wanted me to use my head, he expected me to see it from his point of view. But that was hard, everything I had hoped for was at arms reach now. I just wanted it so badly, it hurt to not be able to touch it.

He's right. I know he's right.

Stuffing my arms into my ribs, I sat back in the seat and turned away from him. I didn't want to admit that everything he was saying was true. Going home would be like hanging a raw piece of meat over a pack of hungry lions.

Diablo probably has someone there waiting for me to show up.

Sulking, I pursed my lips. “I have to do something, I can't just keep hiding.”

“Trust me, Bijou, hiding right now is the best thing for you, and for your family.” Flipping up the thin black handle, Redd turned on his blinker and pulled into the school. “I need you to get down, out of sight. No one can see you.”

Slinking in the seat, I tried to be as small as possible. “Your sister's in high school?”

“Ninth grade.”

“No kidding, for some reason I thought she was a little younger.” Folding my arms, I peeked out the window as he parked against the curb. Buses were pulling up, one after the other, and kids were starting to filter out the double doors.

This is fucking crazy, I went to this school.

The school looked exactly the same as it did when I had been there. Nothing had really changed. The fountain was still perched in the common area off the front doors, dry and water-less just like I remembered. The double doors were the same puke green, and the bushes were cut with the same flat top, like cupcakes with the frosting chopped off.

My first day popped into my head. My father had dropped me off, and I remembered feeling extremely nervous. Grabbing my arm before I climbed out, he told me he loved me and to keep my head up. I had given him a confused look and he laughed, reminding me that he had been my age once and kids could be mean.

'But don't worry my child, you will do fine.'His voice played in my ears, firm and strong.

The thought made my chest pinch and my stomach bubble in sadness. It felt like it had just happened, like my memory was fresh and crisp and had taken place days ago, not years. I could smell the musky cologne he loved to wear and the feel of his hand on my wrist as he tapped the back of my palm and sent me on my way.

I need to see him, I need to know what the hell happened.

How did I end up with Diablo?

I need to know he's okay.

My head was filling with ideas, with ways to contact my father and tell him I was right here the whole time. I was so close, the thought of being right there and not doing anything to see my family was killing me inside.

“Stay down,” Redd whispered softly, glancing around the parking lot and at the school. He looked nervous, eyes darting around anxiously, fingers grinding into the wheel wearing away the grip.

“I am down. No one can see me. Why does it matter anyway? We're at the school, not sitting outside in the open.”

“It matters. You said you lived here, so you went to this school, right?” Flicking his eyes down briefly, his brows knitted hard. Nodding up at him, he rocked his jaw. “Just do what I'm asking you to do.”

I was tempted to jump up and tell him to suck it. I didn't need someone barking orders at me, I had enough of that. But I let it go, refusing to take out my anger on him. It wasn't his fault that my emotions were touchy, it was out of my control, my head instantly reacted defensively.

Watching the kids, I jerked in my seat and sat up straight. Redd threw his hand onto my shoulder, attempting to shove me back down. “Stay down.” Barking through tight lips, he put more pressure on my shoulder. “Get down, Bijou.”

Shrugging him off, I leaned over the dash, and stared out the windshield. My body began to visibly shake and I couldn't stop it.

“Oh my God, is it?” Squishing my chest against the glove box, I squinted. “It is, I know it is.”

My sister. . . That's my sister.

“What's wrong?” Redd asked, noting the shift in my muscles and the look in my eyes. I sat quiet, unable to register his question. “What do you see?”

Pointing to a young girl with copper colored hair and a red bag slung over her shoulder, tears instantly sprang to life. “It's my sister. I need to go see her. I have to talk to her.” Grabbing the handle, I tried to climb out.

I didn't get far, barely cracking the door open wide enough for me to get a leg out. Redd snagged my arm, yanking me back inside. “No! You can't do that, shut the door!”

“Why not!?” Screaming in his face, my chest began to hurt as I tried not to cry. “Let me go! I need to go see her!”

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