Page 22 of Summer Redemption

The moment we pull up to the abandoned barn, one which is a little off the beaten path, Sunshine shoots me a wary look. “What are we doing out here?”

I don’t move to climb out of the truck yet and, instead, look her way while hoping I didn’t push too far by coming out here. I’m tempted to cross my fingers and send up a little prayer, but I find my courage and tell her the truth because she deserves it.

“You know this barn?”

She nods, the movement slow and with a hint of fear. I look out at the weather worn building, one that has seen better days. It’s aged even in the eight years since graduation; it still echoes with moments I spent here. Moments she didn’t get to have.

“The other day when you told me about the way my actions and words affected you, I realized you missed out on coming out here,” I admit and nod toward the barn. “It wasn’t something I realized at the time. I’m not sure what I would have done if I did, but now my eyes are open. I thought we could make a new memory in a place where you should have had old ones.”

Sunshine’s green eyes become glassy with unshed tears and panic hits me right in the gut. I open my mouth to tell her it was stupid and I can find a wonderful place on the ranch for our date instead, but she surprises the fuck out of me by throwing her arms around my neck and whispering, “Thank you.”

I have to swallow hard to try and clear the lump in my throat. The need to get this right wasn’t something I was even aware of, but my shoulders relax with knowing I did.

After hopping out of the truck, I head around and open her door and help her down before I grab the picnic basket and blanket from the back. She eyes the basket with a soft smile on her face.

“Don’t worry,” I assure her as I lean closer to her, “I got some help with the food and stuff. You don’t want me to cook.” I give her a sheepish smile and rub the back of my neck with my free hand before I reach out and grab her hand. “I’m not very good at it,” I admit.

Sunshine’s bark of laughter has me grinning as I lead her into the barn without closing the doors behind us in order to let the light in from the longer summer days. We’ll have some time before the night descends fully and maybe then we can lay out in the bed of my truck and look at the stars.

I already know I’m not going to want this night to end. I’ll never want them to end.

Telling myself not to move too fast isn’t easy, but I know it’s the only way to go with a woman like Sunshine, a woman I treated badly. I need to repair the connection between us and gain her full trust. It’ll take time, but it will be worth it.

She takes the blanket from me and spreads it out before we settle down and she takes in the worn wood surrounding us. This barn might not look like much, but it’s still standing. Even after it was abandoned and became the hang out for the kids of Wintervale who wanted a taste of freedom instead of expectation.

After pulling out food and a thermos of a mocktail I found on the internet, not wanting to drink because I’m not willing to take even a slight risk with Sunshine’s safety, we fall into a gentle silence punctuated by soft conversation.

Without thinking about it, without even meaning to, I tell her about how much Limitless means to me and how taking care of the horses has given me purpose. I even tell her about how it used to feel impossible living in the shadows of my brothers.

“Is that why you became the jokester of the family?” Her question isn’t tinged in judgement, only curiosity.

I look into her green eyes and know this is a defining moment. Down one path is honesty and a future; down the other is a quick joke and the risk of losing her because it’s easier not to be vulnerable when necessary.

“You might not know this, but we were in middle school when Eden left Wintervale. They were high school sweethearts and friends long before they became anything more. It was hard on Fletcher when she left, but they tried to stay together. All my brother wanted was to give her a chance to chase her dreams. After a few years, they broke up and I watched my brother become a shell of himself,” I whisper the words, treating the peace between us like it’s fragile. Because it is.

“That must have been hard on you with how much you look up to your brother,” she offers me gently.

I nod and swallow hard. “Noel was gone, and Carson was,” I shrug and look away, “she was Carson. It felt like it was my duty to get Fletcher to smile again and to live his life. I just didn’t know how to do it. Making jokes seemed like the only way, but then it morphed into something more and I didn’t take anything seriously anymore.”

“Except for Limitless,” she points out, her voice firm as if challenging me to disagree.

“Except for Limitless,” I agree, “but even that I approached as more of a fling than a future for a long time. I was just trying to keep my brother from falling apart the best way I knew how.”

“You take good care of the things you love, Huxley Burns,” Sunshine’s eyes and words burn into my skin, branding me with a truth I don’t allow many people to see.

If I allowed it, then they might see too much. And not just the good things either. They would see what keeps me up at night and the darkness where my fears reside.

My movements are slow and measured as I reach for her, needing her to ground me, needing to be sure. When my fingers tangle in her caramel-colored hair and I pull her closer, she doesn’t resist me. The closer she gets, the more the past fades and all I can see is the woman in front of me, the woman I desperately want in my arms.

“Thank you,” I murmur, our lips almost touching. “For seeing more than I want most people to see and for giving me a chance.”

Before she can respond, I press my lips against hers. It’s chaste at first, but then something shifts, something breaks. My control? The snow globe containing our past?

I don’t know and I don’t care.

My tongue slides along her bottom lip and she moans against my mouth. I don’t let the opportunity pass me by and deepen the kiss. The first taste I get of her is almost too much to take.

I only want more.

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