Page 52 of Reaper

“If you do manage to get into the house, what are you planning to do to Blackstone?” I ask, knowing what he’s probably going to say yet still needing to hear him say it.

“I’m going to kill him,” he says, and it’s not vengeful or proud. It’s just a fact, like saying the sky is blue.

“Reaper, that’s impossible. He’s too well guarded.” My mind races with images of Blackstone’s men, armed to the teeth, eyes sharp as razors. “Has anyone from the club ever gotten close enough to even try?”

“Once,” he confesses with a deep sigh. “But I was just a kid … a terrified one at that.” He turns to meet my gaze, letting me see the regret carved into every line of his face.

“Tell me what happened.” I slide my hand into his, and he holds it tightly.

“One night, Blackstone’s party was out of control. Even though I was in Blackstone’s bedroom, I could still hear everything going on in the house. It was louder than hell. Drunken laughter barely covered the cries I’d grown used to ignoring. Blackstone stumbled around the bedroom while he chased me. The idiot was so drunk and vulnerable. It was my chance, and I didn’t take it.” He hangs his head and withdraws his hand from mine. Shame tightens the muscles between his shoulders. I gently lay a hand there, trying to soothe him.

“None of this was your fault.”

“I could have killed him. I’d found a shard of broken glass on the floor. It was peeking out from underneath his bed. All I had to do was reach for it. But I froze, Lexi. I froze while my brothers continued to suffer in the other rooms. I could have ended it then, but I didn’t. I panicked and did nothing. Just sat there.”

“Oh, honey …” I pull him into my lap, letting him rest his head on my thighs. “You shouldn’t carry that burden. Any kid would have frozen. You were just trying to survive.”

“We spent two more years in the dungeon after that. Two years we could have avoided if I hadn’t been so weak.”

“How old were you when this happened?”

“Twelve.”

“Far too young to stand up to someone like him. Don’t judge yourself for what you didn’t do.You survived, and that’s what really matters.”

“Did I, Lexi?” He tilts his head to look up at me.

“Yes. And consider this, if you’d tried to attack him and failed, you’d probably be dead right now. You’re assuming you would have killed him. But what if you didn’t?”

“There would have been hell to pay.”

“Definitely.”

“So, don’t regret it. Ever. You don’t know what would have happened.”

“You’re probably right.” He glides his hand down my leg, slowly stroking my skin. “I always just assumed I would have killed him.”

“Maybe. Maybe not. But it doesn’t matter now.”

“Because I’m going to kill him anyway.” His eyes go dark and glassy as thoughts of revenge take over. I don’t have to be in his head to know what he’s thinking. It’s the same look he always gets when he’s thinking about killing Blackstone.

“I know Nina made you promise to be careful, but I want you to promise me something else.” I lightly scratch his scalp before tangling my fingers in his hair. “Promise me you won’t go after Blackstone alone.”

The air around us feels charged and ready to ignite. He doesn’t respond for so long I’m not sure if he heard me.

“Lexi …” His voice is steady and eerily calm. “I’m going after him. What he tried to do to Ace … I can’t let that stand.”

My heart pounds as fear and frustration war within me. “But your club brothers—”

“Whether they ride with me or not,” Reaper cuts in. “I’m doing this. If I fail, so be it. They’ll understand.” There’s an edge to his words, the kind that doesn’t just cut but cleaves through everything in its way.

“Even if Blackstone kills you?” My voice cracks, betraying the terror of losing him. “Will they understand that?”

“Even then.” He sits up and crosses his legs, a resolute statue forged from vengeance and pain.

I turn to face him straight on. His eyes are dark pools reflecting the dying day, and I’m drawn to him despite myself.

“You matter, Reaper,” I whisper, reaching up to cup his scarred cheek. “To me, to Ace, you matter.”

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