Page 24 of Matrix

“You couldn’t trust me to be alone.”

“No,” he agrees. “Still, wish you hadn’t been there.”

“What’s done is done.”

He stops chewing and looks at me for a long time before saying, “What did Scar tell you?”

“Not much. He said you can get really upset and disassociate.”

“And?”

“That’s all he said.”

“If you’re lying, I’ll find out.”

“I’m not. Is there more to it? Is there something you want to tell me about what happened?”

“No.” He returns to eating his food.

Instead of trying to pry it out of him, I decide to let it go. For now. Eventually, I want to find out what happened to him, but I can’t force him to tell me. I take a sip of mint tea. Its soothing warmth trickles through my body. I haven’t really slept in two days, and I’m starting to crash. Scar wants us to get to work immediately, and I want that too, but I’m so tired.

“I need a nap,” I mutter.

“Same.” He grabs a napkin and wipes his mouth. “Thanks for dinner.”

“I’m glad you liked it.”

“Eating always helps keep me grounded. But it’s not enough. I haven’t slept in a few days. I need shut-eye before we get started.”

“Me too.” I grab his empty plate and carry it to the sink.

“Leave it. Let the others clean up for once.”

“But I always—”

“Leave it.”

He holds out his hand. I hesitate before taking it. We walk back to his bedroom and go inside. When he closes the door behind us, I tense. I’m alone with a man who just killed someone. This is crazy. I should be running for my life, but the weird thing is that I don’t feel like I’m at risk. As long as I do what they say and help them with Blackstone, then they aren’t a threat to me. Leaving the clubhouse is more dangerous. Scar’s right. The FBI can’t protect me from the men trying to hunt me down. Someone with Blackstone’s reach will find a way to get to me. It would only be a matter of time before someone found me and captured or killed me. I can’t tell my SAC what’s going on, either. If the FBI finds out I’ve been compromised, they’ll pull me off the case and throw me back on desk duty. I had to beg and plead to be allowed to take on this undercover assignment. If I fail, they’ll never let me leave the office again. I’ll be stuck hacking computers all day, far away from the action. Also, Underground Vengeance can get information I can’t access legally. I know they can help me find my sister. Risking my life to save hers is worth it.

“I need a shower.” Matrix heads into the bathroom, pulling the door closed behind him. A moment later, he tosses his bloodstained shirt out, and it lands on top of a pile of laundry. He does the same with his pants.

“I’ll take these to the laundry room. If I don’t get stain remover on them soon, we’ll never get the blood out,” I call through the crack in the door.

Matrix sticks his head out. His eyebrows draw together for a moment before he bursts out laughing. “You’re worried about stains? Is that really your main concern right now?”

“Of course not. But I don’t know what will make you freak out again, so until I figure that out, I’m sticking to neutral subjects,” I snap.

“You’re a little bit crazy, aren’t you?”

I huff and leave the room. Jerk. Of course I’m not myself right now. The last two days have been completely insane. I’m exhausted, and I can’t think clearly. He can’t expect me to be rational. Also, he’s one to talk. I’m not the one who basically had a psychotic break and killed a man. I’ll be able to figure out what to do next once I’ve had some sleep.

After treating his clothes with stain remover, I toss them into the washing machine. I turn it on, hoping the cold water being diverted here makes his shower hotter than hell. It’s petty revenge, but it still feels good.

As I walk back to his room, Reaper steps into the hall. He glares at me, but I’m so angry that I scowl right back. If he thinks he can intimidate me, he’s got another thing coming. As long as Scar wants me around, Reaper can’t touch me. I know he’s got it out for me, but too damn bad.

I brush past him, ignoring him. Once I’m back in Matrix’s room, I slam the door behind me. I’m tired. I’m scared. I’m pissed off, and I need a nap.

After stripping down to my underwear, I put on the tank top I found in a pile of clothes beside my bed. I don’t understand why I can’t just stay in my room. I have no intention of running away. Scar’s right. We need each other to achieve our goals. Until I get my sister back, I’m not leaving. I should be allowed some privacy.

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