Valerie opened her phone to her Notes app and showed him her highly organized writing: the memories from each era of her life going back as far as she could remember. Her father hardly glanced at her notes, and Valerie felt slapped.
Victor rubbed his stubble and gazed out the window, tapping his pencil on the desk.
Valerie thought about Alex back at home, kneading dough for the pizza, and felt a swell of love. That was where she belonged. Not here.
“Can I ask you something?” Victor asked.
“Of course.”
“Do you think it’s possible to be forgiven?”
Valerie hadn’t anticipated such a heavy question on their first day of writing.
“I mean, do you forgive Alex? For everything?” Victor asked.
Valerie took a breath. She realized she wasn’t sure if she felt safe enough with her father to reveal her innermost opinions. Especially her reunion with her husband.
Her love for Alex was private.
And did she know her father enough to trust him?
“Forget about it.” Victor waved his hand. But he still looked disgruntled and unsure.
Valerie filled her lungs.What a day. She hoped the baby hadn’t felt a lick of the stress and anxiety she now carried.
Suddenly, her phone was ringing. It was Alex.
“I have to get this,” she told her father, pressing it to her ear. “Hello?”
“Hey, I have a question about pizza toppings,” Alex said. “Are you cool with black olives? I’m nervous about what the baby’s letting you eat and so on.”
“What? I mean, I guess I can come home,” Valerie said.
“You don’t need to come home!” Alex cried. “Take as much time as you need. I’m just at the store and don’t want to make any stupid purchases. You know how I am.”
“No, if you need me, it’s really okay,” Valerie said, getting up and striding for the door. “I can be there in ten minutes.”
It took Alex another second to catch on. “Ah. You want to get out of writing with your dad.”
“Do you need me to pick up anything?” Valerie asked.
“I’ll see you at home. Love you,” Alex said.
“Love you, too.”
Valerie pressed her phone to her chest and turned to find her father gazing out the window, studying the sailboats in the pink sunset and cruising through the chill. Had he heard anything she’d just said? Or was he so immersed in his own chaos that nothing else existed?
“Dad? Can we pick this up later this week?” Valerie asked.
“What? Oh, yeah. I mean, sure.” Victor got up and gave her a side hug.
His distraction dropped him back in his office chair. By the time she was in the hallway, Valerie had the impression he’d forgotten she’d been there at all.
Chapter Five
Two days after the disastrous meeting with the couples therapist, Victor was out for a walk with his brother, Aaron Sutton, a relationship much like with other family members in that they hadn’t spoken for years and were trying to forge a new relationship. Unlike when he was with Esme and his children, Victor wasn’t overwhelmed with guilt with his brother, and they were able to exchange funny stories and talk about the future in ways he wasn’t sure he could with the others.
Most importantly, Victor could talk about the couples therapist, Hannah.