Page 70 of This Is Who I Am

“Thanks.” She does this trick with her legs to shuffle her stool closer to mine. “See how easy it is to accept a compliment.”

“I don’t understand why you’re flirting with me but I’m in no state to reject you.” I shake my head. “Sorry, that came out wrong, as though I don’t want you to flirt with me anymore.”

“You want me to flirt with you now?” Her smile turns devilish and I can’t stop staring at her lips.

“I do.” I have absolutely nothing to lose. Although I might have something to gain. “Before this goes any further.” I’m so tipsy, I just come out and ask it as though it’s the most logical question in the world. “Can I touch you?”

Bijou tilts her head and narrows her eyes.

“I don’t want to end up in bed with someone I can’t touch.” I shake my head. “I’m not doing that.”

“I feel like we skipped a few steps.” Bijou puts her hand on my arm again. “And, also, what the hell are you talking about?” She runs a fingertip over my bare skin. “Why would I flirt with you if I don’t want you to touch me?”

“You’d be surprised.” I drain the last of my margarita, as though I’m suddenly on a mission. “I live above the restaurant on the cliff. Would you like to come over for a nightcap?”

“I would like that very much.” Bijou empties her glass and slips off her stool.

I take her home and we drink water instead of more alcohol and we stumble into my bedroom. I’m drunk and therefore blissfully free of my usual hang-ups about my body, about getting naked with someone else, and, to be honest, there’s only one thing on my mind: I want to make Bijou come.

And I do. Many times.

CHAPTER34

ESTELLE

Hunter looks a bit worse for wear. Bobby hugs me as though I’m his long-lost sister.

“How’s Cass?” I ask him. “Have you seen her?”

“We got wasted with her at The Bay last night. She’s not doing well,” Bobby says. “Is there really nothing we can do to fix this?”

“We’re working on it.” Devon shoots me an encouraging smile.

Perhaps I’m most surprised that I’m here, with Cass’s friends, while she’s not.

“Where’s your guest of honor?” Hunter asks.

“She texted last night that she wouldn’t make it home and that I shouldn’t worry,” Sadie chimes in. “With Bijou, you never know.”

“She’s still not home? And she knew we were coming?” Bobby nods purposefully. “I know what that means.”

We all sit down. Drinks are poured and it reminds me so much of that brunch a few weeks ago, when Cass and I were still full of potential. My stomach twists, not just because of the pain of breaking up, but because of what I promised Devon I would do after lunch. Because I’m going to see Cass.

A few minutes later, the gate swings open. A tiny woman, her hair still wet from the shower, walks toward us with her hands held up in apology.

“I’m so incredibly sorry.”

“Walk of shame, girl,” Bobby shouts.

“Calling it a walk of shame is so incredibly misogynistic,” the woman, who must be Bijou, says. “But I won’t get into that right now because, frankly, I’m too tired after the night I had.” She fans her face theatrically.

“My husband sincerely apologizes,” Hunter interjects.

“Where did you even meet someone in Clearwater Bay?” Bobby asks.

“Well…” It’s as though Bijou only now clocks me. “Hi.” She walks toward me. “I’m Bijou. I was Sadie’s makeup artist onKing & Princefor many amazing years.” She extends her hand.

“Nice to meet you, Bijou.” I shake her hand.

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