Page 53 of Changing Rules

“What the hell is going on?” my mother cries.

Another wave of shame washes over me.

I’m a piece of shit. I’m no better than her. I’m maybe even worse.

“Kevin! Oh my God! What happened to your face?”

She zips into the room without looking at Xander or me. Kevin’s face is in her hands as she looks him over attentively.

“It’s nothing.” He pushes her hands away and pins me with his gaze.

“The hell it’s nothing!” Mother whirls around, her eyes burning with hatred as she points at me. “What did you do?”

Of course. She’s always so quick to think the worst of me. It’s always me, always my fault. I am the villain in her eyes, no matter what I do.

No matter how hard I tried to change her mind about me, to earn her love, I never succeeded. Each effort only made her hate me more. Until I accepted it. Until I chose to punish her for all the hurt she caused me. Until I decided to make her suffer for her wrongdoings.

She deserved it, I thought.

“I hit him. It’s not her fault.” Xander steps in front of me, but he doesn’t let me go.

“Itisher fault, Alexander. It’s always her fault.” Her eyes darken, her lips twisting in disgust.

“He tried to force himself on her. How is that her fault?”

Xander…

I wish with all my heart I could be anywhere but here.

With a bitter laugh, Mother steps in front of us. “Alexander,” she says, her focus locked on me, “my daughter is a slut. She seduced my husband and carried on an affair with him for months.”

Her words are like a slap to my face. I reel back as if she actually struck me and untangle myself from Xander.

“You knew?” I ask her.

“Of course.” She shrugs. “I found your fucking panties under my bed when I got back from Montgomery. It didn’t take me long to figure out what happened. You told me he raped you, and when I didn’t believe your bullshit, you figured you’d turn your lies into reality, didn’t you? Then, when I was out of town, you seduced my husband.” She lets out a sardonic laugh. “You are a fucking whore, Isabella, and you deserve every ounce of my hatred. Since the day you were born, you have brought me nothing but pain and suffering.”

The already blurry world around me goes dark, and my knees give out again. Xander hauls me to his chest, dragging me out of the room and down the stairs as Kevin and my mother argue behind us.

Over and over, Kevin says my name. It’s the only word I can make out.

Covering my ears, I let Xander steady me against the wall by the front door. He slips his shoes on before helping me into mine. Then I close my eyes.

Stay inside. Hide your secrets and your wrecked soul. Endure the agony. You deserve it. You are a curse. The only thing you have earned is pain.

Xander grasps my wrists and forces my hands from my ears. “Bella?”

I open my eyes and peer at him, unseeing.

“Did you drive here?”

I shake my head. “Uber.”

He disappears for a heartbeat, then returns with a napkin and blots my face with it.

He knows Kevin’s truth. Does he hate me now?

“Let’s get you home, okay?”