Page 85 of Weaponized

“No. Don’t. Don’t say that.” He sounds so broken. “I’m the one who messed up the best thing that ever happened to me. I should have believed in you. Listened to you.Protectedyou.” I can feel him shaking. This big scary man is trembling. “You deserve so much better than me. What I did is unforgiveable. Angel, the things I said—”

I run my fingers through his dark hair. “I love you, Luca. I never meant to hurt you.”

I catch the sudden hitch in his breath as the door flies open. Rowan charges forward, then stops, looks at us. “I’m sorry to interrupt. Really. But, I, uh, need you, Gráinne. Right now.”

Luca

I prepared for this moment for two weeks. I went home from the hospital like Rowan asked, ate an entire casserole, and fell asleep for nearly twenty-four hours. When Matteo woke me, I dragged him into our media room to watch the rest of the video. I’m glad he was with me because I wasn’t prepared for what I saw.

As I listened to Gráinne explain to Rowan that she had met with my father, I began to pace the room. The demons in my head roared as I heard how she recognized my torture room when I explained it to her. Howshehad experienced that room,more than once. How she was afraid to tell me for fear her father would hurt me again. My entire body quaked with anger as Rowan told his sister that she shouldn’t have risked meeting with my father. That he could take revenge by killing her. That, in our world, it would be justified. Jesus. Pop hadn’t said a word. It was all so fucked up.

“Luca’s life is worth more than mine. He deserves to know.”

My head was a fucking mess as my angel spoke those words, and my blood pressure was through the roof. As if that wasn’t enough, next, I watched her confess to her brother what her childhood was like. As she described the “assignments” she had been given with shame and sorrow on her face,I stopped my pacing to growl at the screen. I wanted nothing more than to hurt Cormac O’Toole. Badly. I wanted to make him pay for every pain he’d ever caused her. Every nightmare he’d given my brother. Yes, I would be the one to kill her father. Slowly. Painfully.

“You need to pull it together,” Matteo barked at me. He’d been sitting, body taut, face pale, watching quietly. “We need a plan, Luca, which means you can’t go off half-cocked. That is why Pop never said anything. We need to think this through.”

“What Ineed,” I snarled, “is to go find Gráinne’s father and make him pay.”

“Jesus Christ, Luke. Think. Justthink,” he said sharply. “I love you, brother, but this is the entire reason she didn’t tell you. She was afraid of exactly this. And, she wasfucking right!”

Matteo told me that my anger was dragging me down and would end up getting me killed. He told me that he couldn’t lose me. Then, I’ll never forget what he said next.

“You have a lot of reasons to kill her father, Luca. We both do. But, you need to get your damn temper in check so we can ensurehe’sthe one to pay. You have to tamp it down so you are the man that girl needs you to be.”

“I don’t think there’s any redemption for me, Matt,” I confessed. “I didn’t trust her. I sent her away without even asking for an explanation. The things I said—”

“Shit, Luca. You didn’t believe Gianni because you doubtedGráinne. You believed him because you doubtedyourself. You always thought you weren’t worthy of her. He just offered you the proof you were looking for. That’s why you accepted it so easily.”

I was stunned into silence.

“She was willing to lay down her life for you, Luca. That doesn’t come along every day. But, she needs to be able to trust that you won’t fly off the handle on her. You owe her that fucking much. How will she feel after she went through all this shit and her father hurts you anyway? I mean, fuck, how will I cope? It may be hard for you to see how much you are cared for.” His voice was rough. “But, damn it, Luke, you are.”

He was right. I had to form a solid plan. I had to see if she could love me again. And, yes, I still had to kill her father. I had been going about things all wrong. I’d spent too much time trying to destroy the beast inside me. Now, I knew better. When it came to Cormac O’Toole, I needed to command my rage, not bury it. I would seek vengeance with both a clear head and bloody fists. I would refine my demon into a weapon of precision. That was how I would become both the man and the monster my angel needed.

It was my father who eventually brought in Rowan. Apparently, my father had been talking to him about some sort of alliance whenever Rowan took the leadership position from his father. I had no idea they were working together, or that Rowan had been planning Cormac’s demise with my angel’s help. I was looking forward to making her wish a reality. When Rowan called me as planned, I had difficulty responding. The day had finally come. I made a gallant effort not to look for my angel when I first entered her apartment. Seeing her father was challenge enough. My dad may have been smooth and gracious, but I couldn’t force a smile despite all my practice.But, then, I saw her. It was like the first time I saw her walk into a room. I felt like I’d been sucker-punched. She was sunshine and warmth. And, she looked afraid of me.

But, then, she called me baby, and I swear to God, I started to unravel. I had to touch her. Now, I’m on my knees before her. This wasn’t in my carefully constructed plan. I wasn’t supposed to go off alone or have deep conversations. I was supposed to stay with my brother and father. But, I couldn’t refuse her, and I am so glad I didn’t. She still loves me.A thousand different emotions are at war in my chest. I called her names, pushed her away, failed to protect her, and she still loves me. Despite everything I wanted for today, this is all that matters.

When Rowan bursts in the room and says he needs his sister, it takes me a moment to react. She is untangling herself from me and I feel the loss acutely.

“What’s wrong?” she asks her brother with fear in her voice. I scramble to stand.

“I need you to come sit with Mom,” Rowan tells her with what sounds like a forced calm. She glances back at me and then reaches for her brother. He grabs her hand and pulls her gently from the room.

I follow behind them, back toward Gráinne’s living room, when I hear her gasp. “What happened to her?”

Gráinne’s mother is lying face up on her couch, motionless. Her blond hair streams down the side of the sofa, her eyes closed peacefully.

“It’s just a sedative,” her brother assures her. “She’ll be up within the hour. I need you to sit with her. Comfort her when she wakes up, but don’t let her leave. Not until you hear from me.”

“What’s happening?” She is looking at me. I eye the room and see that the four of us are the only ones in it.

“Victor and Matteo have Da,” Rowan answers on my behalf. “Luca and I need to meet them.”

“Luca?” Her voice is small. Her chin quivers as she searches my face.

“Gráinne.” Rowan’s voice again draws her attention. “You had to have known this was coming. Today is the day. We didn’t need to lure Da to the Larozzi building like you had once suggested. We were able to arrange the setup for here. Let Luca do what needs to be done. Let us finish this.”