Page 82 of Weaponized

He doesn’t return for two more hours. I’ve been pacing the waiting room. Some old woman actually yelled at me and told me I was bad for her nerves. I couldn’t even muster any sympathy. I am singularly focused on my own guilt and grief.

Luca

I have spent four days in and out of her ICU room. They began to wean Gráinne off the sedatives yesterday, and I was told it could still take a few days before she wakes up and they can truly assess the damage. There is a possibility that she’ll fully recover, and I’m clinging to it. I’ve met her mother, who has been hysterical the entire time, though I have not yet been introduced to her father. I don’t think he comes often. I’ve seen his right-hand guy in the hallway, so I assume he’s passing along updates. He seems more focused on who is in the waiting room than he is on anything else, yet we haven’t spoken. Instead, I pass the hours taking turns with Rowan and his mother in visiting Gráinne. I’ve literally slept and showered here.

“You’re Luca?”

I look up from what’s become my designated seat in the waiting area. There is no mistaking Maeve. Like her mother and sister, she’s a pretty girl, tall and golden.

I nod. I should say something, but I don’t know what. No words seem sufficient. She comes to sit beside me.

“I’m Maeve, Gráinne’s sister. Da’s in there now with her. Rowan insisted he be there too. I thought they’d kick one out but I think they were afraid to do it.” She looks at her hands in her lap.“Da said that she was found on the side of the road, that someone hurt her. That it’s a good reminder what happens when you’re not careful.”

Again, I remain silent but grit my teeth at her father’s insinuation that Gráinne is somehow at fault. I had been told the story we were going with. Gráinne had been picked up, beaten, and left for dead. Rowan had received an anonymous call on his cell phone and the two of us just happened to be together at the time. That was the tale. As far as what really happened, my father had it all cleaned up as though it was merely a nightmare instead of my reality.

“She needs to get better.” Her soft voice breaks. “There is no one nicer than my sister. No one. She would always let me hang out with her. And—and—she tells me what to do when people are mean. She knows how smart I am, how I’m different, but doesn’t treat me like I’m weird because of it. She told me about you.”

I look up and see Maeve swipe away a tear. She continues. “She said you were big and scary looking. Covered in tattoos. That’s how I recognized you.” I take a deep breath, not sure if I want to hear what else Gráinne said about me, but Maeve goes on, oblivious to my internal struggle. “She also said that you were so handsome, but that was just what’s on the outside. That inside, you were special. That you knew what it was like to live in our world, but you—you had come out a better person because of it. And, one day, she knew I would meet someone and be as lucky as she was.” She sniffles.

I look up to see my brother standing in the doorway, watching, listening, with Lizzie by his side. I focus on my breathing. Try to calm my erratic heartbeat. “I was always the lucky one,” I croak.I’m dumbfounded when Maeve O’Toole throws herself into my arms and cries.

On the fifth day, I’m holding my angel’s hand, telling her about the time Michael, Matteo, and I got lost in Florence. Rowan walks in halfway through my story, and I stop talking. He looks as bad as I do. As if he hasn’t slept in days.

“The video,” he says dully.

“I—” I clear my throat. “I’d forgotten about it. I’ll make sure we destroy it.” I don’t want to argue with him. Not in front of Gráinne. Somehow, I know she can hear us.

“You didn’t watch it all? The part just before I discovered the bugs?” His voice is wary.

I shake my head. I don’t have the energy.

“You need to do that. Watch the end.” His voice is so flat, distant.

“Okay,” I acquiesce. Whatever he wants.

“No. I need you to listen to me. Go home, Luca. Watch the end of the video, of us talking in her living room. If you still want my sister after you see what she shares with me, come back. But don’t come back until you see it.”

“I—I can watch it later. She’s going to wake up soon. She should have already woken up. I need to be here. I—”

“Luca.” His voice has turned sharp. “Go. Fucking. Home. Listen to what I’m telling you. There’s been enough pain. When she wakes up, I don’t want more.”

“Look, Rowan—”

He crosses the room and shoves his hand against my throat, pushing me further into my chair. “I know you love her, goddamn it. But, after this”—he takes a deep breath—“she deserves someone who knows all her demons and is willing to help her fight them.Go home.”

Rowan drops his hand, clears his throat. I stand, but my legs don’t want to move.

“I should have told you this earlier,” he says sheepishly. “The examinations showed that she, uh, she hadn’t been—they said that there wasn’t—” He stops. Looks uncomfortable. I’m fully focused on him, hungry for any information. He continues, “Her bruising—other than her brain, it was only external. There was no internal, uh, trauma caused by anything. I, uh, I think you got there before that could happen.”

My brain is slow to react, but suddenly, I fully understand. “I still didn’t get there in time,” I say quietly.

“Neither of us did,” he responds, forlorn.

I nod. And listen to Rowan. I go home to watch a video.

Gráinne

I’ve been home from the hospital for a week. I woke up confused and agitated, and I had no idea where I was or how I got there. Then, over the following twenty-four hours, it all came back to me, and I grew even more upset. They tried to strap me down until Rowan threatened them. A few days later, I was moved to a regular hospital room, and a few days after that, I was sent home. Much to my mother and brother’s dismay, I insisted on going to my own apartment.

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