Page 17 of Weaponized

I mean, who goes around just holding hands? Are we in middle school? What does he do with other girls? With that muscled body of his, I’m sure there are plenty of girls coming on to him. Does he hold their hands before sleeping with them? Did I come on too strong and turn him off? Maybe he just acts this way with girls he considers friends? Oh God. Have I been friend-zoned?

I shake off the intrusive thought as Elizabeth moves things around in my refrigerator on Friday night. “All of this food is—I mean,don’t you have anything I can use to make us dinner? Or is it all sprouts and greens?”

I smile at my new friend. “Pretty much. My mother is anti-carb. Anti-taste really. There is some chicken breast in there and stuff for salads if you want. There’s cauliflower rice and veggies if we want to make a stir-fry. I’m pretty sure there are liquid aminos in the cabinet.”

Elizabeth rolls her hazel eyes to the ceiling. “Ooooookay. Maybe we should order pizza?”

God, I haven’t had pizza in years. Too many empty calories. Too much chance of weight gain.

“Pizza sounds great, but can we get salad to go with it?”

She sighs loudly before typing a few things into her phone. “Okay, it’ll all be here in thirty minutes. And, for what it’s worth, you are absolutely gorgeous and a carb or two won’t kill you.”

I grin at her again. Most women I know wouldn’t be so quick to compliment another woman so sincerely. We are raised to see each other as threats.

“Sooo,” I drawl. “Any chance I could talk you into coming to a party with me tomorrow night?” I’m sitting sideways in one of my armchairs with my legs draped over the arm.

She plops down on the sofa, grabbing one of the decorative pillows to hug to her stomach. For someone who just gave me a pro-carb speech, she certainly works to hide her body.

“What kind of party?”

“Chuck-E-Cheese. You’ll love it. Lots of pizza.”

This gets one of Elizabeth’s trademark giggles where her whole face is in on the action. “Yeah, that does sound good.Maybe Chuckie will even let me try his banjo.”

“Well, I may have been exaggerating just a little about the mouse. But, this party might have some other guys who will let you play with their banjos.” I wiggle my eyebrows up and down.

Elizabeth laughs again as she tosses the pillow at my head. “There is something really wrong with you, Gráinne.”

“Tell me about it.” I grin. “Especially when I’m seriously considering going to the Larozzis’ on Saturday.”

All humor has left my friend. “I can’t go there.”

I know she’s been there. I’ve seen her. I can’t tell her that, of course, because“I saw you there the night I sat in a tree and spied on Matteo”just sounds wrong. She even had a few friends she was with.

“Why not? Are you telling me you’ve never been to one of their infamous pool parties?” I wonder if she’ll lie.

She exhales. “No. No, I’ve been to a couple. I just hate going there. My stepsister threatened to get my dad involved if I didn’t go with her, so I went.”

“I’m sorry. Your stepsister what now?”

“Ugh. Okay.” She makes herself more comfortable. “I went through a pretty bad spell of depression toward the end of high school. I’m much better now. Lots of therapy. Back then, I was hung up on my weight and a few other things that hadn’t gone my way. Regardless, I applied and was able to get a scholarship here. They have the best visual arts program around. So, while my dad wanted me to stay home and within his view, he eventually said I could come if I don’t stay inside all the time. Made friends. Valentina will sometimes tattle on me if she thinks I’m not going out enough—or if I don’t do what she wants.”

“Maybe she just cares?”

Elizabeth’s laugh holds no humor.“No. She tells Dad, hoping I’ll get sent home. It’s weird because she likes to have me by her side as her designated fat friend, so she looks better. She knows I don’t want to go to those pool parties.”

I jump up from the chair and sit directly next to her on the couch. She twists her fingers in her lap, but I pry them apart to take one of her hands. “You are not fat, and you’re definitely not meant to be hiding away.” I can tell she’s fighting tears. Elizabeth isrealand I’m sure this Valentina is threatened by her. I’m not sure what else to say. I’ve never been good with other women. This is new to me, this feeling of wanting to boost her self-esteem.

“I know I’m not thin, Gráinne. But I’m okay with who I am. I’m done starving myself, and I’ve finally accepted what is a healthy weight for me. I can even indulge in”— she gasps dramatically— “pizza once in a while. And, by the way, so can you.” She gives me a shaky smile as if she’s not used to lecturing someone. I love watching her come out of her shell.

However, given that Elizabeth dresses in oversized clothing most of the time, I’m not sure if she reallyisokay with herself. I decide to keep that to myself for now, because she seems fragile at the moment. Even if her stepsister is a total bitch, I agree with her father that she shouldn’t hide herself away. She’s a great person.

“Come with me, Elizabeth. I’m going to ask Rowan as well.” I recall the way he checked her out when she walked away at the last party. Plus, he’s still pretty worried about my pursuit of Luca.I’m sure he’ll want to be there. It’ll also be comforting to have Rowan and Elizabeth by my side in case the big oaf ignores me.

This idea interests her. “Maybe. Are you going because you like Matteo?” Her tone is soft, hesitant.

“No. Not even a little. I mean, I guess he’s okay as a friend or something. I actually have a little—like, really teensy tiny—crush on Luca, but I’m not sure it’s going to work out. I guess I just want to see if he’ll notice me.” There. I admitted it. It felt kinda good to say it aloud. The world didn’t stop turning.

---