Page 66 of Find Me in California

Julia’s fingers flex in Liza’s grasp. “More?”

“It’s about Aubrey, Matt’s mother. There are things Matt must know about her and his family, and I don’t know if he’ll give me the chance to tell him.”

CHAPTER 31

MATT

Matt sits up in bed. His gaze coasts around the motel room. Faint light frames the curtains, hinting that the afternoon has eased into twilight. The sheets are bunched at the bottom of the bed, and the stiff comforter is piled on the floor. Empty bottles and food cartons clutter the table. The TV plays, the sound still muted. A talking head points at a weather map. Nothing but sunshine across the Southwest. Whenever he gets motivated, the drive home will be easy. The downpour they had at the airport when he first set off won’t be an issue.

A muffled ring comes from somewhere under the bed linens. He digs for it, finds his phone. He thinks he answers but feels a hand glide up his spine. He feels her behind him as if she’s a sun with its own center of gravity, luring him back to her. He looks over his shoulder at Magnolia. “I thought you were asleep.”

She stretches, catlike, with a deep arch in her back, and yawns. He looks at the clock on the bedside table. It’s after eight in the evening. His stomach growls, reminding him they missed dinner.

“Shouldn’t you go see your grandmother?” She trails a fingernail over his hip.

Doesn’t she remember? He already mentioned he’s going home once he’s motivated to check out.

He turns the conversation back on her. “Shouldn’t you callyourmom?”

Her face sours. She scoots up the bed, pulling the sheet along with. “I don’t want to talk about her.”

“I thought you missed her.”

“I never told you that.”

The first conversation they had when he met her turns over in his mind. “Aren’t you trying to reconcile?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about. I haven’t seen her for years. She left me.”

He frowns. She isn’t making sense. “What about Benjie?”

“My grandfather? He died before I was born.”

Matt stares at her, confused. He didn’t hear her right. She doesn’t sound anything like herself.

The bed shifts as Magnolia presses her front to his back. She rests her chin on his shoulder. Her breath tickles his earlobe. “What’s wrong?”

“For a moment there—” He tugs at his ear with a dry laugh. “Never mind.” She’ll think he’s lost his mind. He’s starting to believe he has. Magnolia doesn’t just sound like Julia—she’s talking as if she is Julia. Julia’s mom left her. Benjie was Julia’s grandfather.

His stomach growls again.

He feels Magnolia smile against his skin. “Hungry?”

“Starving.”

“I’m craving pizza.”

“Perfect. I’ll order in.” He kisses her pert mouth and smacks her rear, rolling out of bed. Somewhere around here is a flyer for the local pizza parlor. He finds it with a stack of take-out menus in a drawer and calls in an order for a meat lover’s pizza. He adds on a six-pack of pale ales. After popping an edible and downing the rest of the Jack, he slides back into bed. The alcohol weaves through his system, relaxing fatigued muscles, and the gummy does more than calm his mind. Magnolia is back by his side. Her arms close around him, and he burrows his head in the curve of her shoulder. He isn’t ready to let her go. He isn’t ready to face the real world. So he decides he won’t.

CHAPTER 32

MAGNOLIABLU

June 7, 1973

I left California almost six months ago, only to return when my parents refused to see me, and I haven’t written anything in almost a year because I didn’t know how. I’ve been renting a room in a house with three other unmarried mothers, struggling with everything I’ve lost. I still don’t know how to express how I’m feeling other than putting this pen to this paper and getting it out. I have to get it out.

Matty had returned later the same night that Liza told him she was pregnant, afraid that I would leave before he could express what he’d wanted to say to me. As stunned and excited as he was about being a father, he said he could not and would not remain married to Liza. No, he hadn’t been faithful to her, but he’d never loved the other women he’d been with, not as he loved me. He’d come to realize those women had been escapes, that he desperately wanted out of his marriage. He didn’t love Liza. Sure, she was gorgeous, and for a while their marriage had had a good run. But her love came with conditions, and too many miscarriages had broken the two of them.

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