Page 87 of Where We Belong

I’m a sucker. I really am.

The answer I should give him is clear in my head, but the instinct to go against it is too intense. It takes over everything. The house could be on fire, and I’m not sure I’d notice.

Wordless, I turn onto my back, keeping my half-mast eyes on him as he sits on my legs and starts massaging the front of my thighs.

Jesus. If I thought the backs of my legs were sensitive under his touch, that was nothing compared to this. His thumbs rub into the muscles of my inner thighs, sending lightning through my entire body. This time, I can’t stop myself from squirming under him.

“You okay?” he asks, his hands resting above my knee.

No, I’m not. I’m so not okay.

Forcing myself to inhale deeply and to stop staring at his nipples through his thin shirt, I say, “Much better than before. Thank you.”

I expect him to take it as a hint to get off and walk away. Leave me be so I can live my horniness in peace. Instead, he stays in place and continues boring holes into my eyes.

“You’re flushed,” he says, his chest rising and falling almost as fast as mine.

“No, I’m not.”

“Yeah, you are.” His hands give my thighs a squeeze, making me gasp. He leans forward. “Tell me what’s on your mind, Lex.”

I can’t breathe. Two options stand in front of me, and neither of them seems good. On the one hand, I can lie and tell him everything’s fine. I can continue to live as if Finn and I are just friends and will never be more. On the other hand, I could give in and kiss him right here, right now. Live through whatever fantasies have been inhabiting me for months now. While I have no illusion that Finn would fall in love with me and want to have all my babies, he might want to keep being friends while also letting us have our fun.

I could go with the first option. I have enough self-restraint left to go through with it. Except that when I glance back at Finn, I notice I’m not the only one who’s flushed. Not only that, but the tent in his sweatpants tells me he might actually want this as much as I do.

And that’s what makes the decision for me.

Lifting myself on my elbows so my face comes inches from his, I say in a breathy voice, “Are those practice sessions you offered still available?”

“Yeah,” he says on a sigh. “Yeah, they fucking are.” And then his lips are on mine, and I forget every reason why this was a bad idea.

As careful as Finn was with me the previous times he touched me, today, he’s unleashed. My fingers dip into his scalp as his tongue enters my mouth and meets mine, the feeling so heavenly it makes me moan, which in return makes him release the holiest of groans.

I didn’t know a sound could turn me on as much as this one just has. An ache builds between my thighs, and when his body drops between my open legs and his pelvis rubs against mine while he drags his lips down my jaw toward my ear, I almost pass out.

How did I ever think I was the problem when this feels so good? Maybe Finn was right. Maybe the other guys just sucked.

Actually, I know that’s the right answer when Finn’s hands dip from my neck and he drags his fingertips over my sternum, between my breasts, and I feel like crawling out of my skin from how much I want this.

“God, Lex,” he whispers before pressing a warm kiss to my clavicle, the smell of pine trees storming my senses and making me want to bask in it forever. “Do you have any idea how long I’ve wanted this?”

His words only prime me more. In one quick move, I pull his head down to me and take his bottom lip between mine, my turn to taste him. His tongue curls slowly around mine, as if we have all the time in the world. I feel like devouring him whole, while he seems intent on making this last forever.

“You’ll let me know when it’s too much, yeah?” he says between kisses.

I nod before pulling his T-shirt up. He helps me take it off, and once his naked chest is above me, I let my hands roam free. If I believe the sounds he lets out, he doesn’t mind.

“Can I?” he asks, pulling at the bottom of my top.

I answer him by removing it, leaving me only in my sports bra. Even so, he stares at me like I’m wearing the prettiest lingerie. Like I’m someone who deserves that kind of stare.

“You’re so fucking beautiful,” he says. I’m still in workout gear, my hair is a mess, I have no makeup on, but somehow, with the way he looks at me, I believe him.

Carefully, he brings his hands up to trace the outline of my bra. Just as I let out another moan, one of his thumbs rubs delicately over my pebbled nipple, making my eyes drift close. My body is flooded with sensations, from the hardness of his length pressing against my soaking middle to the taste of the strawberries he was eating when I came in. It’s too much and yet not enough. I want him everywhere.

Making eye contact with me, he grabs the bottom of my bra. I nod, which prompts him to pull it up, baring my small breasts to him.

“Goddammit,” he says, kissing between the two before twirling his tongue around my right nipple. “I’ll never get enough.”

---