“Do you think... can I— What can I do to fix things with her?” That’s all I want. To get us back on the right track we were on before. I mean, if that’s even possible at this point.

Ryan bites her lip and picks up a guitar that was on the couch, avoiding my gaze. “I don’t know, man.”

Leela stomps over to me and grabs my shoulders. “Stop trying to be strategic. This isn’t a session, Reggie. You can’t DM a relationship! Just be yourself. Usually—not right now—butusuallyI really like that person. Most people do.”

Well, I know that’s not going to work. Leela is seeing things through some rosy-ass glasses if she thinks most people like me just as I am. And things have only gone so well with Delilah so far because I’ve been playing this just right. Today... today was shit. But maybe I can find something in between—and real fast, before I lose Delilah for good.

SAT, APRIL 1 4:56 PM

I’m so sorry I missed you Delilah!! I got caught up doing something and lost track of time.

I am the absolute worst

It’s fine

Can I make it up to you?

Tomorrow is national peanut butter and jelly day and I make a real good sandwich

You know because it’s a holiday and we can keep working on our mission

lol

Sorry I’m busy

TUE, APRIL 4 10:03 AM

Okay so today is national hug a newsperson day and I’m not totally sure how legit that is but maybe we should go find Marc Brown

You know from ABC 7?

Man my dad loves that guy. Sometimes I catch him talking back to the screen like they’re buddies or something

Marc Brown might need our help! Homeboy is a legend!

Haha

Or lol we could just hang out in a normal way

SUN, APRIL 30 6:21 PM

I know I messed up and I’m probably annoying you now, but I wanted to send you one more message and then I’ll leave you alone for good. I promise. On that Saturday I wasn’t even that busy. I was legit just sitting around with my friends. But then when Ryan texted, I didn’t want to show up right away because I didn’t want you to think I was just waiting around for you to call. EVEN THOUGH I WAS TOTALLY WAITING AROUND FOR YOU TO CALL! I was playing games and it was stupid and I hope I didn’t completely destroy this between us because I think you’re really awesome and I really wanted to get to know you more.

Want not wanted!!

Stupid

I was talking to my voice to text app not you!!!!!

Oh man I’m going to see myself out now. I won’t bother you again Delilah

Thank you for apologizing. You should probably apologize to your app too. It’s doing its best.

Hi! Yes! You’re so right I need to appreciate her services

Why do you assume the app is a girl?

Ah! You’re right! I don’t know!! It’s like the patriarchy or something and I need to let that shit go because I’m afeminist. We should all be feminists like that book title and yeah god is a woman!