Page 17 of One True Loves

Lenore:

Tessa:I’m done. I’M DONE! Promise.

Lenore:Jesus christ I hope so

Theo:Do you feel proud of yourself?

Tessa:And throw the coins separately! Not at the same time

Tessa:Okay, I’m really done now

Theo:ANYWAY what I was trying to say was, at the open mic, we saw this guy. I think his name was Trainor? He had Frank Ocean performing “Moon River” vibes.

Theo:And he’s going to be playing Buskerfest Labor Day weekend. We should all go! Lenore will you still be here then?

Lenore:I’m not sure. I have to look it up.

I know I won’t be; I’m moving at the end of August to get all set up in the dorms before orientation. But I don’t have the heart to tell them that yet. It makes it feel final. The life they’re all going to have together after I’m gone.

Tessa:I hope you will be. And when you think about it, Labor Day isn’t even that far away. Like, weeks! This can be our last hurrah!

“Last” for me only. Because I am the one’s who’s leaving. Very soon.

To study something that I haven’t figured out yet.

To prepare for a future that’s a blank, scary canvas in my mind.

The prospect of trying to figure this all out by the time our ship docks in Barcelona at the end of this trip feels so overwhelming and impossible. Dread sits on my chest, making it tight and heavy like I’m locked into one of my aunt Stacy’s death-grip hugs.

Lord, maybe Tessa is onto something. Out of all the shit on my plate, all the items on the long list of things wrong with me, maybe it would be easier to focus on this romance bit. Well, maybe not easy, because I definitely pissed off an old crone at some point in my life and am cursed to only be a guy’s stepping stone on their way to something serious. But a swoony, no-strings-attached fling with a mysterious foreigner would be a nice distraction from trying to figure out my whole damn life these next couple weeks, at least. Tessa seems to think it’s as easy as throwing some change in a fountain and making a wish. I could do that.

Lenore:Okay, I know I’m going to regret this, but this Tembi chick did the coin thing? And then met an Italian bb? Explain.

Theo:Why are you encouraging her???

Tessa:I JUST SCREAMED

Tessa:AND HIGH KICKED

Tessa:MY DREAMS ARE COMING TRUE

I’m outside in Rome for approximately two seconds before I am completely certain that Tessa has no idea what she’s talking about

Rome is hot. Oppressively hot. Satan’s-morning-breath hot.

And I’m convinced all the romanticization of this place that Tessa has obviously fallen prey to is a conspiracy to sell pink paperback books to impressionable young girls, because ain’t nobody falling in love in this heat. Nope.

My under-boob sweat is significant. My shorts are out here trying to strangle my thighs, squeezing out a steady flow of sweat down my legs and into my gold gladiator sandals. And I’m estimating that I have a very short period of time before the two sweat sources combine and flood the cobblestone streets, giving Rome canals to rival Venice.

I want—no, Ineed—air-conditioning. Immediately. And it’s barely even eight a.m.

“Okay, so we will begin the day at St. Peter’s Basilica,” Etta says, holding up a map that’s almost as tall as her. “I’ve signed us up for a free tour, and it’s in English—I’ve already confirmed. After that we’re going to go to the Colosseum and the Roman Forum, which I know is a little bizarre, as we’re not viewing them in chronological order, but from my research, I think thelines will be better this way. After that, we can take a quick lunch break, and if time permits, visit the Palatino before—”

“Hold up,” I say, interrupting her. “You’re talking aboutjusttoday?”

“Correct.” Etta blinks at me and continues to recite her memorized itinerary while I zone out.

Our ship boards tomorrow at the port in Civitavecchia, meaning we only have one day to explore Rome. So, I thought we would pick a couple sights, maybe stop for some cacio e pepe and definitely a few rounds of gelato. Not traverse the entire city! But of course Etta always has to make everything an extra, endurance-testing learning experience.

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