Page 16 of Monsters of Mayhem

“Then you better start getting friendly with Tony Furlan,” Eunice said, “because he’s about to come straight through that door. You can either go out the front door, the back door, make friends with Tony or be turned into a stick.”

“Can’t you do something better than a stick?” I asked. “How long does it last?”

“That’s the thing,” Eunice said. “I can’t change you back immediately. It’s not like you’re a stick and then you’re not. If you become a stick, your body needs to stay that way for at least twenty-four hours and then only after that you can turn back into your regular form.”

“How about a statue?” I asked. “Bale, too? He needs to be protected. These guys will kill him if they get half the chance.”

“Are you sure this is the choice you want to make?” Eunice peered at me.

“Make me into the statue like one of those,” I pointed out a wooden statue of something that looked like a Hindi goddess sitting on the shelf. “You can turn Bale into a little Ganesha or something.”

“He can stay a hellhound made of wood,” she nodded. “Only he’ll have to be a lot smaller and I’ll put him on the shelf with you.”

“Do it,” I insisted as the door rattled with Furlan rattling the handle.

“Eunice, I know you’re open. Come out of there,” he called. “We’re trying to find somebody.”

“Caroline, are you ready? “Eunice asked.

“Absolutely,” I lied. I wasn’t completely ready for this at all, but I knew it needed to be done.

My fingers went to the top of Bale’s head and I stroked his fur with unease. “You ready, boy?” I asked the smiling beast. He gave a small little yelp, which was answered by a loud knocking on the door and I could feel the glass almost crack beneath the hands of Tony Furlan.

“Open the door or I will break it down,” Tony insisted.

Eunice raised her hands and motioned them over my body. She said an incantation I couldn’t quite make out, but it sounded like listening to a foreign movie backwards.

“Piccola ta Bruh Rica.” Her words intoned. She repeated the phrase three or four times, and I stood there waiting for something to happen.

Just when I thought the spell wasn’t going to work, I suddenly felt my skin harden. I looked down and saw the grain of wood forming over my entire hands. I was also getting smaller and smaller. The room was getting bigger and bigger around me until finally I was only about a foot tall. I could angle my eyes just enough to see Bale was a tiny statue of Ganesha standing next to me.

Eunice picked us up quickly and set us on the shelf.

“Hold your horses, Tony Furlan. I will be there when I’m good and ready,” Eunice shouted at the door, pushing me back a little farther on the shelf so I didn’t stand out so prominently.

She opened the front door and Tony walked in, his nose sniffing the air carefully.

“She’s been here,” he insisted, glancing down at the tarot table, which still had my tarot reading out on it.

It felt strange to be so small and be so stiff. I couldn’t feel anything at all in my body, but I could still see out through my eyes. I wondered what they looked like, but it seemed as if they must’ve looked just like wood. No one took a second look at me at all. I could feel one of my arms was raised above my head and the other one was held in front of me with the thumb and forefinger joined in a circle and three fingers held up. It must be some sort of a blessing. I felt like I was posed in a dance motion but at least it didn’t hurt my arms to hold this position. After all, my whole body was made of wood.

“Where did she go?” Tony asked.

“Is that any way to speak to your elder?” Eunice responded sternly.

“My apologies, Eunice,” Tony seemed genuinely chagrined, “but this woman’s life is in danger and if we don’t find her soon, she’s most likely going to end up on the evening news and then I’ll have hell to pay from Ryder.”

“Why is her life in danger?” Eunice asked.

“She’s come under demon attacks,” Tony said. “Ryder thinks there’s a monster after her.”

“What do you think is after her?” Eunice asked quietly.

“Eunice, I’ve got no idea.” Tony said. “I know Ryder really cares about her and he’s not going to sit by and let her get killed. If anything happens to her, he’s going to take it out of my hide. Pretty sure he’s crazy about her.”

If I wasn’t wood, I would’ve scoffed. Crazy about me? Is that why he had sex with me and left? The guy just had a hard on after having a fight and he had used me to release some of the energy. Now I was sitting on a shelf made of wood and I was going to be here for the next twenty-four hours.

“I’ll tell you she was here,” Eunice murmured. “She went out the back door.”

---