ARYAN
I dashed out of my room, the air leaving my lungs in sharp, uneven bursts as I stumbled into the verandah. The night was cold, but it did nothing to cool the heat burning under my skin. I leaned against the wooden pillar, pressing the heels of my palms into my eyes, desperate to erase the image of her face, wide-eyed, frightened, lips parted as if caught mid-breath.
What the hell was I doing?
Touching her? Grabbing her like that? My hands clenched instinctively at the memory, shame clawing at my insides like a wild animal.
“Shit,” I hissed under my breath, raking my fingers through my hair before grabbing the back of my neck in frustration. “I was fucking stupid.”
I shook my head, trying to dispel the guilt fogging up my thoughts. I hadn’t meant to scare her. I’d just... lost control. One second, I was yelling, angry, furious even and the next, I was so close to her I could feel her breath. If Avni hadn’t pushed me away, I don’t know what I would’ve done. No, that’s a lie. I do know.
I almost pinned her down. I almost kissed her.
A bitter laugh escaped me. I was insane. Completely out of my damn mind.
She was my wife in name only. A fake title, a staged bond. Nothing real between us except the paper we signed. But the need inside me was real. Burning, breathing, pounding in my chest like a war drum.
And yet, even now, I didn’t know who I had betrayed more: Avni, my fake wife, or Ira, my ex-girlfriend.
I turned and made my way down to the cellar, grabbing a bottle of whiskey without much thought. The kitchen was dark, and silent. I moved like a ghost, retrieving a glass, then returning to the verandah. The first pour sounded like relief. The first sip was a relief. Warmth spread through my veins like a temporary cure for the poison running through my mind.
For a few moments, I allowed myself to feel nothing.
No Avni. No Ira. No guilt. Just me, the alcohol, and the cold hush of the night.
I leaned back in the chair, letting the night envelope me. I was tired, more than tired. Exhausted in a way that went beyond physical. But sleep wouldn’t come. Not with her in my bed. Our bed. Even if just for a few months.
I’d slept in worse places. I remembered freezing in a cave at -3°C during a mission, my body shaking but my mind alert, and focused. I could sleep on thorns if needed but not beside her. Not with her wearing that kind of nightdress.
I would strangle Rhea for that. What the hell was she thinking giving Avni something like that to sleep in? I made a mental note to scold her later.
My phone buzzed. Seven missed calls. Twelve texts. All from Ira.
I sighed, unlocking it. Her words hit harder than I expected.
I thought you don’t want to marry her?
Have you slept with her?
I think I’m the third person now.
Today I felt like I was coming between you two. People laugh at you two. They think you're the worst couple they’ve ever seen. I tried to cancel my leave. But I didn't because I don’t trust her with you. Are we still getting married, Aryan?
The last message was just minutes ago.
I stared at the screen, fingers hovering over the call button. I couldn’t do it. Not now. Not when my world was already crumbling into chaos. First, I had to deal with Avni.
Tomorrow I’d go see her doctor. I needed answers. How long would this recovery take? How long before I could send her away with no guilt hanging over my head? I’d hire the best physiotherapist, make sure she healed well and fast.
And then… I’d be free.
With a frustrated grunt, I slammed my phone down on the table and poured myself another drink. The burn of whiskey was sharper this time, but I welcomed it. The shittier life got, the better alcohol tasted.
Time passed slowly. The clock read half past one in the morning when I finally dragged myself to my feet. My limbs were heavy, and my thoughts even heavier.
Grandma was here and that meant I had to sleep in the room. To her, Avni and I were a happy couple, madly in love, completely devoted. In her world, fake marriages were inconceivable. What would she say if she ever found out I was the one who hit Avni? Maybe I’d tell her one day. I’d never kept secrets from her. She was the only constant in my chaotic life.
I opened the bedroom door quietly and stepped inside.