Page 32 of Omega's Refuge

I laughed. “You only want that because you haven’t heard me sing yet. The coyotes are better than me.”

“Oh, pooh,” Martha said, waving a dismissive hand at me. “I don’t believe that for a minute.”

“You should.” I grinned, suddenly feeling a bit happier. “Glass shatters when I go for a high note.”

Martha chuckled. “You’re a kook, Tanner.”

“I know.” I smiled.

Rex stood, scraping back his chair. “You folks finish your breakfast while the boys and I pack everything we’ll need for the trip. Be sure to wear comfy clothes and pack some layers for the evening. It might get a bit chilly. Most of the day will be spent on horseback, riding to the river.Once we get there, we’ll set up camp while you enjoy views of the mountains and check out some good fishing spots.”

My stomach warmed when Rex patted my shoulder before leaving the dining room. I knew he was happy I was staying for the rest of my vacation, and despite the depression I felt about Steve, I was happy too. The more I thought about returning to Billings, the more I dreaded the idea. I didn’t want to be anywhere that reminded me of Steve. Returning to the apartment we’d shared would be gut-wrenching. I didn’t feel strong enough to handle that yet.

Once we’d finished our meal, we went to our cabins and packed up what we’d need on the overnight trip. Next, we joined Rex and some of the ranch hands outside, where they had our horses ready for us. It was obvious the Rambling Cow had trips like ours down to a science. Rex and the guys had loaded up the pack horses with everything we’d need as if they’d done it a hundred times before.

We left the ranch for the river around noon. I was happy I had Spitfire again as my horse because we’d found a happy rhythm with each other on our other ride.Our group rode along the base of one of the mountains, in a valley nestled between two pine-covered ridges. We spotted some mule deer as we trailed over the foothills, and I inhaled the fresh pine scented air.

It was impossible not to think about Steve as I rode along with the happy group. My heart ached when I remembered his smile or the sound of his voice. To combat feeling morose, I tried to focus on the positives of his absence. For example, I didn’t have to feel guilty that I enjoyed riding Spitfire. I didn’t have to worry that Steve might freak out with jealousy if Rex smiled at me or talked to me. While my chest felt hollow from the loss of Steve, at least I didn’t have to deal with his constant complaints. I could relax and immerse myself in the outdoors, appreciating the happy group I was traveling with.

While breaking up with Steve was horribly painful, the sense of finality this time around gave me a perverse sense of relief. I didn’t have to wonder if maybe we’d reconcile. The first time we’d broken up, I’d hoped and prayed he’d see how wrong he’d been and come back to me. Now that we’d given it another shot, I realized he wasn’t anywhere near ready to be the alpha I needed. I was gutted to also lose my best friend, but after how he'd behaved on this trip, I had to question if we’d ever actually been real friends. What kind of friend would treat someone the way Steve had treated me on this trip?

It was late afternoon by the time we reached the river. Rex and two other ranch hands, Gus and Ronny, got to work setting up camp. I was happy to see we each had our own tent. I’d worried thatbecause I didn’t have a partner, I might have to bunk with one of the ranch hands, but that wasn’t the case.

My tent was located at the end of the row of tents, near the trees. Rex’s tent was at the far end from me, which was a little disappointing. I found Rex’s presence comforting, but maybe having distance was good. This way I wouldn’t be tempted to sneak into his tent tonight. I had a feeling Rex would sleep with me if I offered, and it was easy to make stupid decisions when you were heartbroken.

After the camp and tents were set up, Rex led us to the river for some fly fishing. Rex pointed at the river as he spoke. “Now, while this river seems calm, the truth is it has a very quick current, and a strong undertow. It’s dangerous. It’s perfectly safe if you’re on the shoreline, but it’s important you guys stay out of the water.”

Joe chuckled. “You don’t want to jump in and rescue our ass, is that what you’re really saying, Rex?”

Rex gave a gruff laugh. “I’d definitely rather not test my swimming skills in that river. I’m not sure I’m life guard material.”

“We’ll keep our distance.” Tanya gave the river a wary glance.

The rest of the group nodded, apprehensively eyeing the river.

“Okay, now that I’ve thoroughly scared the cow dung out of you.” Rex grinned. “This is a great time of day to fish. How about we catch ourselves some fresh fish for dinner?”

“You have a lot of faith in us, Rex.” Martha laughed.

“Is there anything else to eat, just in case we suck at fishing?” Tanya asked.

“You bet.” Rex began handing out the fishing poles as he spoke. “We’ve got you covered either way. We brought extra food.”

“I’ve never gone fly fishing before,” Peter said, grimacing.

Rex smiled. “No worries. I’m going to show you the technique my grandfather taught me. I won’t just throw a pole at you and hope for the best.”

Peter laughed. “Whew, you had me scared there for a moment. I didn’t want to look like a fool in front of my new bride.”

Tanya hugged her husband. “Don’t be silly. You can do no wrong in my eyes, babe.”

My heart gave a little pang as I watched them. I envied how in love they were. If that had been Steve and me, he’d probably have made some sarcastic remark about me being a horrible fisherman. Watching the other couples interact was painful, but it was also a good reminder of how someone who loved you should treat you. I needed to focus on that to help me feel at peacewith the breakup. I deserved to be loved and respected.

Somewhere along the way, I’d lost sight of that. My relationship with Steve had been tainted by suspicion and the fear of him straying. I wasn’t sure why I’d allowed myself to be drawn into something so dysfunctional and emotionally unhealthy. Was it merely because I was getting older and worried that if I didn’t land an alpha soon, I’d be too old?

My thoughts were interrupted as Rex began demonstrating the proper technique for casting a line. He made it look easy, but when it was my turn to try, I discovered it wasn’t easy at all. I definitely wasn’t a natural. I kept getting my line snagged on small boulders and hidden grass beneath the water. I was trying to untangle my hook from a big clump of weeds when Rex approached.

“Are you a vegetarian?” he asked, smirking at the mound of green roots hanging from my pole. “Trying to catch us some veggies for tonight?”