Page 78 of The Manny

Why was it annoying me that Jack had decided to go out drinking? I was confused by my own response to his phone call earlier. What did I care if he hung out with the boys? Had I secretly hoped he’d want a repeat of last night? That was stupid of me. After all, he wasn’t my boyfriend. We’d simply slept together, while insisting it meant nothing. We’d scratched an itch. While he’d seemed to enjoy himself as much as me, maybe the night hadn’t lived up to his expectations?

Although, if that were true would he have wanted me to spend the night in his room? Perhaps I’d insulted him when I’d refused? I’d only been thinking of Mia. I didn’t want to do anything that might confuse her. Surely Jack understood that.

“Thomas, is this one good?” Mia was holding up a watercolor painting, and looking at me expectantly. “I drew the duck pond.”

I smiled at her, trying to get my head back in the moment. “It’s beautiful. I love the bright colors.” What was I doing? I was on the clock, and Jack wasn’t paying me to sit around thinking about whether or not helikedme. Geez, I was acting like a teenager, daydreaming about the boy I had a crush on.

Mia set her paintbrush down and she came over to me. “Are you sad, Thomas?”

Surprised at the question, I frowned. “No, sweetie. Do I seem sad?”

She nodded. “You have a line there.” She pushed her finger against my brow. “All day long, you had it. Mommy used to get that line when she was sad.”

My heart squeezed at her worried expression. “Hey, I’m supposed to take care of you. Not the other way around.”

“Course I care,” she said softly. “I love you.”

I hugged her, my eyes stinging. “Awww, I love you too, Mia.” I wasn’t lying. I was always fond of my kids, but Mia was special. I’d bonded with her immediately. Maybe because Jack had seemed so distant with her, I’d felt it was more important to connect to her. Whatever the reason, I couldn’t imagine saying goodbye to her. I hoped things kept going well with Jack because I’d be heartbroken to leave her.

I might even miss Jack.

“How about we make some cookies? Uncle Jack would probably like that.” I said brightly. “I sure could use your help, Mia.”

She nodded, her eyes sparkling. “Yes! I want to do that.”

“Great. I think it would be a nice treat. We worked hard today feeding the ducks, and you did so well on your ABCs and painting.”

“Yay!” Mia jumped up and down. “We get a treat.”

I grinned. “Let’s wash up and then go make those cookies.”

“Okay.”

I took her into the bathroom and scrubbed her little fingers clean of all the paint. Then we headed into the kitchen where I pulled out bowls and measuring cups. I had her scoop sugar and crack eggs, with my help. I found it adorable how into it she was. Some kids just liked to do the messy parts, but Mia was very serious about all the steps. I suspected we had a future baker in the family.

The house smelled of chocolate chips and oatmeal by the time we finished baking two types of cookies. I fed her a light dinner of chicken stir fry, and then we sat outside in the backyard and had cookies and milk as dessert. It was a really nice evening, although I had to admit I missed Jack. A strange thing, considering if he bothered to join us in the evenings, he mostly just sat nearby quietly. Yet, even when he didn’t join in, he’d sometimes laugh softly at things Mia said, while keeping his gaze on the TV.

Getting Mia to go to bed was a challenge because she was hopped up on sugar. I bathed her and read her a few stories, and she finally began to lose steam around 11:00 p.m. Once she’d finally drifted off to sleep, I went to my room and took a shower.

No matter how many times I told myself I didn’t care if or when Jack came home, the truth was every time I heard a noise, my pulse sped up, in case it was Jack. It was after 2:00 a.m. by the time he finally came home. I hated that I knew that because I’d been determined to not care.

I heard him moving around in the kitchen and had to force myself to stay in bed. I had the oddest compulsion to go to him. I’d barely seen him this morning before he went to work. In the past, I hadn’t cared if he’d left for work without saying anything. Why was our one night together making me crave his company so much more than usual? Perhaps because he’d been open with me last night. Vulnerable even.

I punched my pillow, grumbling to myself about what an idiot I was. When my door opened, I rolled over, thinking maybe it was Mia. But the shadow that entered the room was way too big and burly. My pulse picked up as I recognized Jack approaching my bed.

“I’ll leave your room if you want me to,” he said softly.

My heart was pounding so hard, I found it hard to speak. I couldn’t exactly say I wanted him to leave. Part of me had hoped he’d sneak into my room, although I hadn’t thought for one second he would. But there he was, in the flesh.

He knelt beside the bed, his face in shadow. “I just wanted to see you for a minute.”

See me for a minute?

That statement made me laugh and he laughed too.

“Lame excuse, I know,” he whispered.

“I’m glad you’re home in one piece.” I stayed where I was, lying on my back, watching him. Just having him near made me hard. The scent of his cologne and the hint of beer on his breath was a turn on. I knew he had to be drunk to be sneaking into my room at this hour. I didn’t care because if that was what he needed to have the courage to approach me, then so be it.

---