Page 102 of The Manny

He leaned toward me. “If you never want to sleep with me again, I accept that. I don’t like it, but I accept it. But what I can’t accept is that you’d blindly believe the word of a stranger over mine. You say you don’t know if Gus was lying or not.” His mouth hardened. “I say you’re full of it. You know me well enough to know I’m not like that. It’s insulting and hurtful to me that, simply because you’re scared of caring about me, you’d make me feel like shit. I don’t deserve to be treated this way. I deserve your trust, just as I’ve given you mine.”

I hung my head because a blind man could see Thomas was a good person, and Gus was a jerk. “Okay.”

He hesitated. “Okay, what?”

“I… I believe you over Gus.”

“Really?”

I nodded. “I don’t think you’re promiscuous.”

“Thank you, Jack. That means a lot to me.”

“You’re welcome.” I sighed. “But I… I was serious about us not sleeping together anymore.”

“I know.”

“You’ll see it’s for the best.”

“Sure.”

“Sleeping together, it was just complicating things.”

“I don’t agree. I think it made us both happy.” He shrugged. “But then you don’t really want to be happy do you, Jack?”

“Says who?”

“It’s obvious. You’re more comfortable in your little protected bubble. I find it sad, but it’s not my job to try and change your mind. What we had was fun while it lasted, but I’m a big boy. I was hired to take care of Mia, not you.”

“So long as you remember that, we should be fine.”

“Trust me, I won’t forget.”

I kept my gaze averted because looking at him was too painful.

“I guess there’s nothing else left to say,” he said quietly, moving toward the glass door. “Have a good night, Jack.”

“You too.” I heard the sound of the door closing as he entered the house.

Thomas had accepted my decision to stop sleeping together. Things would go back to how they’d been in the beginning. He’d be my employee and I’d be his boss. Mia would still be taken care of by the person she loved, and I could retreat to my cocoon where no one got close to me.

That was the exact outcome I’d wanted, so why was my stomach churning? Why did I feel depressed? If this was actually the result I’d hoped for, why couldn’t I shake the uneasy feeling that I’d let something precious slip through my fingers?

Chapter Eighteen

Thomas

A month went by with Jack and I pretending we were nothing more to each other than employer and employee. I’d have been lying if I said it was easy. Even though we’d barely gotten started when it ended, it was difficult to let my feelings toward Jack go. It had been a heady experience when Jack had acted like he really wanted me. Needed me. Trusted me.

He joined Mia and me for dinner most nights, but he barely said a word to me. He started joining Brody and the others at Brannigan’s almost every Friday night. On those nights, he usually got home very late, and he certainly made no attempt to sneak into my room. I had no idea if he was hooking up with other guys, or not. It killed me to think he might be. Whether he wanted me anymore or not, I still wanted him. But I might as well have been a lamppost for all the attention he gave me.

One afternoon, I was outside with Mia watching her play in the backyard when my phone buzzed. My heart rate sped up when I saw a text from Jack.

Sorry to bother you. I left some important papers in my office. I can’t leave the shop today. Would it be possible for you to drop them off later? Anytime this afternoon is fine.

It was unusual for Jack to ask for a favor, especially from me. He must have truly been unable to get away from the shop if he’d reached out to me. It was tempting to tell him to fuck off, but naturally, I didn’t. I instead texted a cheerful:Sure!

Thanks. I realize this isn’t your problem.