Page 49 of Doubts & Fears

“None, I’ve never had a lover. Alek is the first man I’ve ever kissed. Isn’t that pathetic? Twenty-one and never been with a man.”

“You’re trying my patience.”

“I’m sorry. I’m not trying to.”

“Don’t make me ask again.”

I looked out the window as his stare burned through me. I relented and mixed some truth into my storyline.

“My mother was small like me, maybe a little bigger, but not by much. She taught me how to sing. She had the most angelic voice, and sometimes, if I’m quiet enough, I can hear her. It’s usually only a chorus, and there’s certain music I can’t sing. It tears me up inside. Her favorite songs do, anyway. She taught me that if I couldn’t express myself with my words, I could always do so in song or dance. I was really young when she died.” My voice shook, and I worked at controlling the tears.

“Beautiful. Now, was that so hard? What aboutyour father?”

My heart clenched as the ache burned inside, but I knew what to do. I had practiced this lie and similar ones over the years so that if I was ever asked, it would be believable.

“Never knew him, and my mom died when I was young, so I never got the chance to ask.”

“Is this really the road you’re going to travel?”

I shrugged my shoulders and remained silent.

“So, in essence, you’ve no problem insulting my intelligence with lies. Malyshka, something you should know about me, I don’t do lies.”

His sensual voice, even when reprimanding, called to something deep down, and it made me shake. My nerves were fraying by the minute as he continued to stare.

“I can tell you something about my grandfather if you’d like.”

He cocked his head to the side and nodded. A reprieve. I seized the moment and placed my hand on his chest, playing with the buttons on his shirt.

“Last night, when I asked you to talk while I laid on your chest. I used to do that with him. We would spend hours training, and I would be exhausted. Sometimes he would push me past my limits. When all was said and done, he’d let me lean against his chest.”

It was another mix of lies and truths. The lie was it was Owen, and the truth was it was actually my father, but Nik didn’t need to know that. I closed my eyes, trying to envision being held by my father.

“I would fall asleep with my head on his chest, listening to him read or hum. He knew the vibration soothed me.”

His expression softened, and his fingers brushed against my cheek. “My lap is available for you anywhere and anytime you need it. No questions asked.”

“What if you’re with another woman?”

“Doesn’t matter. Anytime, anywhere. Although you may have to come and find me.” He leaned in, kissing me.

“Don’t tease me. I’m a needy girl, and I don’t like to share,” I murmured against his lips.

“Is that so? I love it, but if you keep looking at me like that, Marcus may change his opinion of you. And we’ll miss your appointments.”

I continued to stare. He kissed me deeply then, his tongue dancing with mine, teasing me. His lips were like silk, and his kiss was gentle. I didn’t want him to stop.Damn, he made my body hum. After a few minutes,I pulled back.

“Baby girl, there’s only one room in our house that’ll be locked. You won’t be able to get in unless we give you the code.” His voice once more rumbled through my core, and I shuddered as he rubbed my bottom lip with his thumb.

“I’d never bother you in there, Crow,” I said, my heart in my throat. Somehow, I knew he was referencing the playroom.

“I thought you were a needy girl. I’ll give you the code if you’d like it.” He was challenging me. He wanted me to have it. Maybe I should. I could sneak in there and acquaint myself with the instruments of torture.

“I don’t think I’d like to see you in that room.”

“Are you jealous?”

“No. I’ve no claim to you.” My voice shook as I thought of him claiming me in some small way in the playroom.

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