Page 144 of Doubts & Fears

“What? I wasn’t joking. We have plans. Now get in.”

As the car rumbled along the winding road leading to Graham’s estate, I shook the feeling of uncertainty away. Bringing Kinsley into this secretive part of our lives was a bold move, one that held both risks and rewards.

Maybe if she saw we were willing to open this part of our lives to her—the secret Death Squad life—maybe she’d open up too. I glanced at her from the corner of my eye. Her gaze took in the landscape, the dense trees, the sprawling fields, and I couldn’t help but be struck by her reaction. I pulled the car in and cut the engine.

“Where are we?”

“Soul-snatching grounds. Where we conduct business when justice gets denied.”

Her eyebrows shot up to her hairline, and the parting of her lips conveyed a sense of wonderment, as if the world she was stepping into held a touch of magic. In that moment, I realized my decision to share this hidden corner of our lives was met with a response that was beyond what I could have expected.

Her arms wrapped around me as she squealed. I laughed at her response, and my heart slowed its nervous thumping. She was thrilled, floored, and her unspoken gratitude left me both stunned and deeply touched. I took her inside, past the row of workers and over to the corner we had set up.

“No torture chamber?”

I shook my head.

“A pig farm? Fucking brilliant.”

“You think so?”

“God, yes. Blood is spilled here daily, and every once in a while, human blood is added. It’s genius. Tell me you don’t feed them to the pigs?” She looked horrified by the thought.

After I composed myself and stopped laughing, I assured her nothing like that was taking place. “We have friends in the crematorium business.”

She listened, and I shared. This was a huge part of our lives, and in my heart, I needed her to know exactly who we were. The only one who didn’t like sharing Death Squad business was Alek.

I handed her a body suit to cover and protect her clothing from the blood she would be shedding. “Put these on.”

She hastened to obey. The air around us shifted, and her demeanor changed as a sense of purpose filled her. The rustling of the fabric echoed in the quiet moments, and soon we were practicing. She was getting better, but after about two hours, she grew tired, so we took a break.

“Do you think I could join the Squad?” she asked innocently.

I froze, growing serious. “Why on earth would you want to do that?”

“What? Join the Squad? I don’t know, maybe do my part to help rid—”

“Nikogda! Do you understand me, young lady? It willneverhappen. We’re done, get changed now.” My cheek twitched in anger, and she was stunned by my reaction.

She spun around and walked over to the area I directed her to and took off the suit. I left to talk to Graham and then ushered her to the car.

“I’m sorry. I overstepped,” she apologized, as we walked to the car.

I stopped her. “Alek and Nik have given you rules, correct?”

“Yes, Sir.”

“I’ve refrained from doing so for the sole reason that you are damn near perfection to me. Everything you do when it comes to me is fluid. There exists an understanding between us.”

“Yes, Sir, I feel that too,” she whispered, as tears fell.

“You’re the only pure thing in our lives. When the world reminds us of how pitch black it is, you’re the light that chases it away. We need you there, waiting for us so the demons don’t drag us down to hell with them. If you’re not there, or if something happened to you…”

My words left a haunting visual, and my voice shook. Something spoke to her in that moment, and she looped her hands around my neck and wrapped her legs around my body, then laid her head against my chest.

“I’ll be there, my love. For you and for the Reaper and the Crow, always,” she crooned in my ear.

I held her tightly, trying to hold back the shudder that coursed through me. The demons I fought to slay didn’t frighten her. The ride home was quiet, and dinner uneventful. After she asked to be excused, I filled the guys in on our day.

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