Page 136 of Doubts & Fears

“Me? Never,” I said dramatically.

“Marcel’s suggestion was a gift, little love. I had Gerald put it in your travel bag. Nik can go over it with you later.” Ivan smiled.

“As long as she understands that the rules will be different for each of us,” Alek warned.

What on earth were they talking about? What could it possibly be? A journal to jot down my nightmares or my feelings? That didn’t make sense, but why would I need rules? Dinner went over well; they were loosening up.

They sometimes talked about work cases, although I could tell Alek didn’t want me to know much about what they did. I remained quiet and learned if I didn’t ask questions, they would talk more freely. I didn’t mind; I could listen to them talk forever.

Later that evening, I took a bath and put on my robe, then went to Nik’s room. As I took my travel bag into the bathroom to finish getting ready for bed, I remembered I had something I wanted to discuss with him.

Setting it down, I poked my head out and said, “You know, I think it’d be a lot easier if I had a set of things in each of your bathrooms. You know, shampoo,conditioner, body wash. I could shower or take a bath at night in here. It’s not like you haven’t seen me naked a hundred times.”

He smirked. “A hundred times, huh? I’ll talk to the guys. It definitely has merit.”

I had a feeling he wouldn’t mind. I disappeared back into the bathroom and went to brush my teeth. Reaching into the bag, I touched something foreign, and my hand froze. What in the actual fuck? “What the hell is this?” I came out of the bathroom holding my bag.

He must have been waiting for me because he had moved and was now leaning against the doorframe. His arms were crossed, and he was blocking my way. A slew of emotions hit. Embarrassment, curiosity, and arousal coursed through me as my heart raced. He looked into the bag.

“Looks like a small personal massager,” he stated, like we were discussing the weather.

“Clearly, now what’s it doing in my bag? Are you trying to tell me Marcel suggested this?” I asked, disbelievingly, and then it dawned on me. I groaned, “Dear god, and you guys let Gerald put it in here?”

“He did indeed, and actually, Marcus picked it up for you. Besides, Gerald stocks the playroom. This is nothing.”

I choked. As if it wasn’t bad enough, even Marcus knew about it. “What’s wrong with Marcel? Why on earth would he think I needed this?”

“Well, maybe because he asked me why you always do that.”

“Do what?”

“Blush. You blush whenever you tell him you’re sleeping with me. I personally love it.”

“Well, that’s all good and well, but what on earth made him think this would solve that issue?” I shook the bag at him.

“Well, he thought you might be less, um, needy, if you could take care of yourself.”

“That’s ridiculous. This silly thing couldn’t hold a candle to…to—” I stopped as he grinned.

“Go on, what were you going to say?”

“I swear, Marcel needs an ass kicking. I have half a mind to do it myself. He should consider himself lucky that there are over four thousand miles between us.”

“Really, now.”

“Yes, and what am I supposed to do with this, anyway?”

“God, you’re killing me.” He pushed away from the doorframe. “What happened to that extensive knowledge you boasted about? Does it only extend to sucking a man’s cock?”

“Don’t be silly, Crow. I know plenty of things, and I know what you do with this. But what amIsupposed to do with it? I’d much prefer flesh on flesh, thank you.”

“I don’t know. You liked the one I used earlier today. Quite a bit, actually.”

My pussy clenched as I thought about it, and I remembered how wet I was and how hard my legs shook. My calves still ached from how tense they were.

“I did like it very much, but it was attached to your finger, which makes all the difference in the world. I’m not allowed…it’s not appropriate for me…Oh, never mind.” I gulped, almost outing a small secret of mine.

The Mask told us so often that we weren’t allowed to play with ourselves. We were threatened with—no, I couldn’t go there. I didn’t want to ruin my evening. He frowned, stepping closer.

---