Page 50 of Star-crossed Betas

“Tell me anyway.”

“Fine! Because you’re such a fucking bossy bottom sometimes, I thought maybe one day, if I got used to it on my own, I could let you try and top me, okay? Are you happy now? Put the fuckingdildo in the bin. I’d forgotten I had it anyway,” I huff and start rummaging through the box for some bed sheets.

“No.”

“What do you mean, ‘no’?”

“Keep it.”

“I don’t want to keep it!”

“Well, I want you to keep it!”

“Why would you want me to keep it?!”

“Because picturin' you fuckin’ yourself with a dildo for me, is makin' me hard as fuck. So keep it!”

I’m not sure who moves first, but we’re suddenly chest to chest with our mouths crashing together. Cee's fisting my shirt, and I rip his open, buttons flying off in all directions. He bites down on my bottom lip—hard, and I can taste the coppery liquid on my tongue.

I take my shirt off, and Cee undoes my belt, mouths only parting momentarily to catch a breath. He shoves his hand into my boxers and wraps his hand around my already throbbing cock.

“Shit,” I mutter as he squeezes tightly, dancing along that line between pain and pleasure. I shove him back onto the bare mattress and tug down his trousers, taking off his socks as I go. Ditching the last of my own clothes, I climb on top of him, grinding my erection against his. It’s been so long, and the tension between us is pulled so tight that I don’t expect either of us to last very long.

Our kisses remain aggressive, biting each other’s lips until they’re puffy and swollen. Pushing back Cee's knees, I expose him and press my tongue to his hole. He moans loudly as I lick and spit into him, getting him as wet as possible because god knows where the lube is. I reach my fingers up to his mouth so he can suck them. Once they’re coated in his saliva, I press them both inside him slowly, waiting for him to adjust to theintrusion. He bears down, and my fingers sink deeper. I change the angle so they graze over his prostate, and he moans, as responsive as always. He moves his hips, and I lick around his rim while he fucks himself on my fingers.

“Fuck, I’m ready. Fuck me.” He groans as I pull my fingers out. He doesn’t need to tell me twice. I spit on his rim some more so it’s wet enough and then use the precum leaking out of his tip to lube up my cock as best as I can. As I nudge my swollen tip into his hole, my eyes roll back at the intense pressure. I forgot how fucking amazing and tight he feels wrapped around me.

I slowly enter him, inch by inch, and he moans when my hips are flush with his arse. As I look down and watch where I’m fucking into him, I’m reminded of our first time. My mind was blown at how well he took me inside his body and how much he trusted me to make him feel good. When I pull out, he shuffles back on the mattress and turns onto his front, his forehead against his forearms, as he presents himself to me.

It stings that I know he’s doing this to make it feel less intimate, but I’m currently far too desperate and horny to dwell on it. I can’t help but bite my own lip at how sexy he looks with his back arched like that. Pressing my thumbs into the dimples at the bottom of his back and gripping his hips, I push back inside him.

“Fuck, right there. Yes.” He gasps when I change the angle to peg his prostate with each jerk of my hips. My thrusts get faster, and Cee meets every single one, pushing back onto me. He feels so unbelievable that I’m battling to stop myself from coming before he does.

I reach around to jerk him off because I know I won’t last much longer. The moment his release spills onto my hand and his hole clenches and pulsates around me, I’m a goner. He moans obscenely as my cock throbs inside him, filling him withmy cum. My orgasm hits me so hard I think I even black out for a second.

As my limbs turn to jelly, I drop on top of him. We’re both sweaty and breathing heavily. I’m too spaced out at present to think about what this means for us going forward, but it’s safe to say a year apart hasn’t dulled any of the passion between us.

I’m a bit lightheaded from all the champagne and could do with some water, but I don’t want to move. I know as soon as I get up, the spell will be broken, and nothing has ever felt more right than having Connor’s warm, soft, naked body under mine. Now, just to work out how to keep him here forever—because I’m not naive enough to believe a marriage certificate will be enough.

Twenty

March 2022

Connor Kelly

Fuck. This was a bad idea. This was a very bad idea. Probably one of the worst ideas I've had in a while, and that's saying something because most of the time, my life feels like a series of highly questionable decisions.

After our major lapse in judgment last night, Phoenix made the bed while I quickly washed up in the bathroom. Now, the sun is peeking through the curtains, and I’m lying still as a statue with Fee sprawled half on top of me, his morning wood digging into my hip. Having sex with him last night has cracked me wide open, and I’m suddenly exposed in a way that’s making my skin itch.

There were times in the last year I tried to convince myself that sex with Fee wasn’t all I’d made it out to be; I told myself I didn’t know any better because he was my first and only. While he’s nolonger the only person I’ve had sex with, I know a connection like ours is rare. I think we could live five lifetimes and still want each other on that baser level. It’s not only physical, though; it would be easier if it was. His soul speaks to mine, telling me I’m right where I’m supposed to be when I’m wrapped up in his arms, enveloped in his scent.

Damp earth, lavender, home and mine.

It’s a slippery slope taking comfort in Fee’s arms, though. He broke my heart once, and he could do it again. The sensible thing to do is to put some distance between us, both emotionally and physically. Starting by untangling myself from his heavy limbs.

Most of the shops in the small village we’re living in will be shut today as it's a Sunday. I don’t have a car here because Mikey and I share a work van, but I’m insured to drive third-party, and Phoenix’s Jeep is just sitting out there on the drive. I pull up Maps on my phone; Leeds is only an hour’s drive away. I could probably be there and back before he even wakes up.

Right as I pull up to Go Outdoors, somewhere between Leeds and Bradford, my phone pings, alerting me to a text message.

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