Page 14 of Star-crossed Betas

I’ve always had a short temper; thankfully, Fee never seems to take it personally. Even if I get irritated and snap at him, he laughs it off, and a minute later, he’s over it. I hate apologising, so I appreciate how quickly he lets things go.

Somewhat regretting getting stroppy with Fee over the contents of my bag, I want to get the night back on track.

“Um, Fee?” I ask between kisses. “Have you ever had sex before?” I try to sound casual.

“Huh...? Erm, we’ve had sex quite a bit, so I’m kinda worried you don’t seem to remember it. Have you hit your head on something?” He holds my face, pretending to inspect it for bumps and scrapes.

“Ugh, you know what I mean.”

“Are you sure you want to know this?”

“Yeah.” I nod, vehemently.

“Fine. Roughly two years ago, I got pretty hammered at my brother’s wedding and slept with a bridesmaid. She was from a different pack, so it seemed a good idea at the time. My brother disagreed since she was his new sister-in-law. Honestly, I don’t even remember it very well.” Fee gets a dusting of colour on his cheeks at the confession.

“So, you’ve never had sex with a guy before then?” I blurt out.

“Not anal, if that’s what you mean. I’ve done other stuff. Why the sudden twenty questions about my sexual history anyway?” he asks before the penny drops. “Oh shit, that’s what’s in the bag, isn't it?” Fee says in a rush before going to grab the aforementioned bag from the ground next to us.

“I don’t have anal in my backpack, no,” I reply, being difficult on purpose.

“Got the good stuff, too,” he says, inspecting the label of the lube he found in the front pocket.

My face feels so hot it must be crimson. Why is this so embarrassing? We sixty-nined right in this very spot a week ago, so I’ve no idea why I’m suddenly getting shy about this.

He gently kisses the tip of my nose, then looks around at the pile of blankets and the gas lamp that’s creating a soft glow.

“Baby, I can’t believe you did all this,” he says softly.

“I’ve, um, never done this before, but I've read about it, and I thought maybe we could try it?” My voice comes out a few octaves too high, betraying my nerves.

“I’ve thought about it a lot too, anal, I mean,” Fee says, and relief washes over me.

“You have?”

“Mhmm. When you planned this, did you, erm… picture yourself on the giving or receiving end?” Fee asks, sounding as nervous as I am, which makes me feel better. Like we’re in this together, and it helps me find some of my confidence.

“I thought maybe at first you could try fuckin’ me, but if you don’t want to, we don’t have to—I’ll just blow you.”

“'I’ll just blow you'—way to woo a guy,” he says teasingly. “I’ve read about it too, you know…” I arch my eyebrow at him. “Fine, I watched some gay porn—for research purposes. I knew if we ever did this, that I wanted to make it good for you.”

I can’t help but laugh, and it breaks some of the tension. I believe him, though. Above all else, I know Fee will put his all into making it good for me.

“What if, well. What if, um, there’s… you know…?”

Fuck me, why can’t I get my words out.

“I can honestly say I've no idea what you're asking me, but if there’s something worrying you, you don’t need to be embarrassed to talk to me about it, okay?” I take a deep breath.

“Um. What if there’s, like, shit?” I can see him fighting the urge to snicker because he doesn’t want to offend me, but with the words finally spoken, I can’t help the laugh that slips out, and all I do is set him off.

Gathering himself, he says, “Look, there could be some shit, yes. But think of it this way, if I come knocking on your front door, and you answer, I can’t exactly act surprised by that, can I? If you get what I’m saying…” I snort out even more laughterat his analogy, but it does ease some of my concerns, and how he puts me at ease makes my heart swell.

“You really missed a great opportunity for a back door joke there.” Fee shakes his head at me, but he’s grinning.

Deciding the time for talking is over, I reach up and pull Fee’s face down to mine and kiss him hard. The anticipation of what we’re going to do has me tenting my joggers, and when he grinds against me, I groan into his mouth.

We break apart the kiss just long enough to pull our bottoms off. With neither of us wearing underwear, we’re suddenly exposed to the cold air until Fee blankets me, settling back between my legs. His hard cock rubs against my own, but it’s not enough.

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