Page 12 of Back in the Saddle

‘She’s just worried about you. You know how she is. She just wants to see you happy again.’

Hunter bit his lip and measured the words. ‘Why can’t you all get it in your heads? I’m happy as a bunny. I don’t need to be in a relationship for that.’

‘Don’t you, though? You haven’t been the same since—’

‘Sometimes it’s better to mind your own business,’ Hunter interrupted.

Buck looked pensive as he nodded several times. ‘Mom doesn’t know half of it though, does she?’

Hunter didn’t meet his brother’s stare.

‘How you banged every buckle bunny after rodeos when you were in the circuit?’

It was a rhetorical question. Of course she didn’t know. What was he meant to do, broadcast it to the world? One-night stands weren’t a big deal. He never promised anything to any of these women. And they didn’t expect anything of him, apart from a good time and maybe a few drinks. He always made it clear that he wasn’t looking for anything that’d last past the morning.

A strange void deep in his gut opened, pouring confusion onto his thinly scarred wounds. Realistically, Hunter knew he couldn’t grieve forever. It hit him that he didn’t want to. Lately he had started thinking that maybe there was something … well, not necessarily missing. He wouldn’t say that. He knew better than to try to base his happiness on the presence of another person. No, it wasn’t that. But gradually, as the time went on, he started craving the conversation. The morning-after coffee and breakfast. Having someone out there who he wanted to be the first to find out everything good and bad that happened to him.

Luck had it that shortly after that realisation he had met Caroline. And as much as he didn’t want to think about her, because he knew there was no point, the other night when ‘White Horse’ by Chris Stapleton came on the radio in his truck, he could almost taste that kiss again. He thought he would never be able to listen to it again without thinking about her. The buckle bunnies Buck mentioned weren’t the same. Maybe because the kissing was always followed by sex.

‘As it happens, I decided I might be ready to meet someone new. For real, not just to have someone in my bed on a Friday night,’ Hunter finally announced as Buck quirked his eyebrow sceptically.

Just then, Michelle came over and asked if they wanted anything else. Hunter ordered another cup and a lemon bar. Buck just asked for a glass of water. They didn’t speak to each other until she brought the order over.

‘You actually mean it?’ Buck asked. ‘You’re ready to go on a real date?’

‘Well, not sure what you mean by a “real date” … but yes. If I meet someone interesting, I’ll ask her out,’ Hunter said, picking up the steaming mug.

Buck’s timid joy disappeared as quickly as it showed in his smile. ‘If you meet someone …’ he echoed, staring at Hunter blankly. ‘You’re going to set up a profile on dating apps or websites, right?’

Hunter didn’t answer, breaking off a piece of a lemon bar instead and chewing it slowly. It was delicious. Just the right level of sweet and sour.

‘Hunt, tell me you will. How else are you planning to meet a woman?’ Scepticism and concern danced together in Buck’s eyes.

Hunter swallowed the last bit of the bar and laced hisfingers together. He didn’t look at Buck when he spoke. ‘I don’t like the idea of using these apps. They sound like a lot of work and not much fun. Whatever happened to chance meetings and connecting with real people?’

‘They arerealpeople, and you can connect with them in real life after you chat with them online.’ Buck grimaced and laughed tensely, disbelief echoing in his words. ‘When was the last time you heard of people meeting by chance?’

‘You mean, aside from you and Lorna?’ he asked, and Buck nodded once.

Caroline.

But something stopped him from telling Buck about her. The sad embarrassment that he was still dwelling on their meeting despite not having any means of contacting her. He had gone back to The Rouge Scot two nights ago, grabbing drinks with his best friend, Mitch. His stomach had flipped whenever a blonde woman walked through the door, just to drop down in disappointment when it wasn’t her.

He didn’t know if he’d ever see her again.

‘I don’t know,’ he finally said, avoiding looking at his brother.

‘Well, I think you might be looking for a very long time.’

‘I’m a patient guy.’

Buck raised his empty water glass and clinked it against Hunter’s half-full mug. ‘Cheers to that, little brother. Can’t wait to meet whoever you deem special enough to measure up to your expectations.’

‘We’re going to be late. I told you we should’ve left earlier. Now the doc will be annoyed – you know that she has other patients to see, right? She’s a busy woman.’

‘We won’t be late, Dad,’ Hunter replied patiently, tighteningthe grip on the steering wheel. They were on the way to Alan’s biweekly visit to the cancer centre. Normally they arrived in plenty of time to find the best parking spot. However, today they had left the ranch late because Alan couldn’t find his glasses again. The traffic also seemed to be worse than usual, and as soon as they got into Oklahoma City they ran into pretty much every red light.

Alan was starting to get visibly agitated, drumming his fingers on his thighs. He huffed, fiddling with the brim of the straw hat sitting in his lap. Hunter glanced to the side at the next set of lights and squeezed his father’s knee.

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