Page 14 of A Cornish Winter's Kiss

‘I love what I do now, but never say never. I just love stories, all kinds of stories. That’s why I think people-watching is such a great way to generate ideas. I sometimes do it to create a more rounded picture in my head of a character whose story I’m narrating, but as a writer I’m guessing you could give anyone you saw a whole backstory.’

‘It’s not usually how I work.’

‘Isn’t this whole thing about trying something different? Maybe you should give it a go. What about her?’ Emily pointed to the woman who’d just passed them and was now about thirty feet away. She’d looked to be in her mid-fifties. She had dark circles under her eyes, suggesting a problem with sleeping, and she hadn’t minded one bit when Rufus had rubbed himself against her leg as they’d passed one another.

‘Her name’s Samantha, she’s fifty-four, and she’s just coming out of the other side of a tough divorce that she thought might kill her, but she’s just starting to realise she’s got her freedom back.’

‘That’s a lot of detail.’ Emily raised her eyebrows and gestured towards a young couple standing next to one of the trees, clearly trying to get a closer look at the deer. ‘What about those two?’

‘Okay, their names are Lily and Sam, both mid-twenties. Lily is a vegan who is passionate about the environment, and Sam is just pretending to be so that she’ll sleep with him.’

‘Wow. Cynical.’

‘All right then, so what backstory would you give them?’

‘Let’s stick with Lily and Sam.’ Emily leant forward in her seat. ‘They’re great names, and I think you’re right about the ages too. I’d say they first went out together at school, lost touch when they went to different universities, and bumped into each other by chance just today, in one of the park cafés. She’s an aspiring wildlife photographer, and he’s struggling to get his career as a journalist off the ground.’

‘And you said I gave Samantha a lot of detail.’ Jude laughed.

‘I’m not finished yet.’ Emily screwed up her face for a moment. ‘Spending time together today makes them realise they still have feelings for each other, and that they share a passion for wildlife that they could use as a basis to support one another’s careers. Their walk in the park will lead to dinner, and a discussion about setting up social media accounts that showcase Lily’s photographic skills and Sam’s journalism side by side. They’ll become an online sensation and?—’

He couldn’t stop himself from cutting her off. ‘Wait, don’t tell me. They’ll get married, have three beautiful children and live happily ever after. The end.’

‘And what exactly is wrong with that?’

‘Nothing.’ He shrugged, telling himself he should just leave it there, but somehow he couldn’t. ‘Except the truth is that even if Lily and Sam do get married, they’re more likely to end up getting divorced than staying together. And even if they do stay together, statistics suggest the chances of them being genuinely happy are even lower.’

‘Do you really believe a good relationship doesn’t make people happier?’ Emily was looking at him with something akinto sympathy, but there was no reason for anyone to feel sorry for him. He was realistic, and as far as he was concerned that gave him the advantage.

‘I’m sure a good relationship would, I just don’t think many of them exist.’

Emily took the flask out of her bag and set it down on the bench between them. ‘Can I ask you a question?’

‘Okay.’

‘Who broke your heart so badly that it left you doubting whether a good relationship is even possible?’

‘I’ve never had my heart broken, because I’ve never been stupid enough to put it on the line.’ Jude bent down for a moment and fiddled with the clasp on Rufus’s lead so that he wouldn’t have to look Emily in the face. If he did, she’d realise he was lying. His heart had been broken by two women, it was just that neither of them had been the woman who’d walked out of their shared flat to go off with another man, and he didn’t think Emily would understand that. The first woman to break his heart had been his mother when she’d died, and the second time it had been broken by the cruelty of his father’s new wife. His experiences had showcased in technicolour what happened when you ‘fell in love’. His father had been almost destroyed by Ros’s death, and Sandra had done her very best to finish the job during their marriage. He didn’t want to risk losing someone he loved, any more than he wanted to risk falling in love with someone who turned out to be another person entirely. That was a mug’s game.

‘I think that’s really sad.’ Emily poured hot chocolate into the tin mugs she’d brought with her.

‘I take it you’ve had your heart broken and it still hasn’t put you off trying to find love?’ Jude did his best not to sound dismissive, but he wasn’t sure he’d pulled it off.

‘I’m not sure I’ve had my heart broken either, but I don’t think it would put me off if I had. I want something like my parents have got. If you saw them, I’d defy even you to be cynical.’

‘Ah, but that’s from the outside looking in. No one can really know how it feels unless they’re on the inside.’

‘But how will you ever understand how it feels to be on the inside if you don’t even try?’ Emily gave him a look of exasperation, just as the distinctive sound of hooves clip-clopping along the path towards them filled the air and Jude had to grab hold of Rufus’s collar to stop the dog trying to lurch forward, despite the fact his lead was tied to the bench.

He’d been about to respond and tell her that he’d got close enough to the inside of his father’s relationship with Sandra to experience its ugliness first hand, but he was glad the carriage had come along to stop him. He hadn’t spoken to anyone about how those years with Sandra had shaped him, and he had no idea why he’d come so close to opening up to a woman he barely knew. There was just something about Emily that made him feel he had to justify his beliefs, but he had no idea why that was either.

7

Emily was starting to feel guilty about taking Jude’s money. She’d done her best to show him what falling in love felt like, but the comment he’d made yesterday in Richmond Park kept coming back to her. He was never really going to understand what that looked like from the outside; he had tofeelit. Watching other people in real life was no different to watching a movie. It was too disconnected from whatever it was that had closed Jude off to the idea so completely. She’d tried asking him about his past, but it was like the shutters had come down. He’d insisted he’d never put his heart on the line, but she’d have bet three months’ rent that someone or something had hurt him really badly. If he wasn’t willing to share that with her, she had no idea what to show him that might help. All she knew was that her latest idea wasn’t working. She’d arranged to meet him at the London Eye, after a tipoff from a callout she’d put on social media. A man had responded to say that he was planning to propose to his boyfriend after they got off the three o’clock flight, on the fourth anniversary of their first date. Emily and Jude had arrived in time to witness the proposal, but it was clear it had left him cold.

Now they were wandering along the South Bank Winter Market and Jude kept sighing audibly.

‘What’s wrong?’

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